#and she's vengeful yet sad

[hauntingmiser]

[ GORE WARNING AND SPOILERS FOR P4/ P4G IG idk????? But yeye ]

MERMAY DAY XXIX ?

sooner or later the investigation heard noises coming from the middle of the fog ever since teddie's submarine was put down in the middle of the fog

The team settled to go to the bottom middle of the fog and put an end to the curse once and for all

until they heard a sore throat yet horse voice calling one of their team members name........

"hₐₙₐ-cₕₐₙ....." the voice said, suddenly yosuke was shocked and questioning if he had heard this voice before and then it clicked on him, it was that girl the one that yu found when he was in his evening swim and the one that he met in June's and so after realizing that voice he shouted through the fog and called her name by the amount of luck he has

"HUH!.....S-S-SAKI!?" yosuke said stuttering his own words

she approached the investigation team and from that day forward, yosuke was all correct all along....

" 𝗛 𝗔 𝗡 𝗔 ~ 𝗖 𝗛 𝗔 𝗡 !!!!!! "

"....oh god......" yukiko feared "this can't be....right?"

" I believe so..." yosuke frightenly answered

The fog covered the team's vision, then vanishing the only to find a merzombie corpse approaching them slowly.....oh god

It's her......

saki....konishi.....the second victim of the crystal curse of "mother nature"

what did this to her? If teddie was right about the biomechanical warfare and that means...

The investigation team had no choice but to attack her and kill her just to keep going until they find the center of the fog

[tsuncda]

so am i right or am i right in my assertion that bridgerton doesn't actually do character work, it just rebrands it's main characters before their season begins and tries to recontextualize them as poor little meow meows.

[cannibalisticskittles]

with baldur's gate 3's full release date looming (two months from now lmao but still so fucking jazzed) i've been thinking about what amity would've been doing moments before being sucked into a giant living mindflayer spaceship

i think no matter what she would've been somewhere in baldur's gate -- which, despite being her home city, isn't actually very typical of her. she's spent maybe 30% of her life in the city proper, with all the traveling along the caravan routes she's done, and that was mostly when she was itty bitty and then tapered off when she got older

but i think that at a certain point, she'd take over as head of the family business from her father, after he finds he doesn't have much time for his experiments and being on the council and running the business, and he's certainly not going to spend less time with his research. i like to think she acquired the former house of the Big Bad they faced down and has been turning it into a hub for the business -- a more formal place for people to go to request services, and all those fancy rooms can be turned into free places to stay for employees who are between assignments, and all sorts of other benefits.

anyway baldur's gate already has official teleportation circles, but you can make your own with the right spell, and she did acquire that on her journeys. but to establish a permanent teleportation circle, you have to cast the spell every day for a full year in the spot you want it. so she's been staying put in baldur's gate while she gets this set up, bc having a way to get people to the hub directly has a lot of benefits.

then there's the question of how dramatic to make it, lmao

the more likely and more mundane explanation for what she's up to just prior to being squidnapped is that she's preparing to set off on another adventure as the teleportation circle has now been established and things at the hub seem set up enough that she can leave it in someone else's hands

the more dramatic answer is that maybe over the course of that year, she got herself caught up in bluebeard-like shenanigans -- just because she has to stay in the city for a year doesn't mean she's all that confined, since the city is big as hell, and she does like to wander. she stumbles across some fallen belonging and bam, now she's haunted by the ghost of someone who was married and then murdered for her money, and she wants amity to get revenge for her which quickly turns into 'marry and then murder that guy so that all of his possessions which used to belong to me and his other victims will be yours and you can give him to our families' which leads to amity getting squidnapped at the altar as she's prepared to do some light murdering

like i said, the more mundane explanation is, uh, less ridiculous lmao. but it's fun to muse.

[the-acid-pear]

I really doubt I'll be able to survive the upcoming years so if i don't remember me as the very horny for Willem Dafoe guy

[unknown-cold]

This was the last thing she saw of her mother.

This part when the casket was closing Caitlyn was not only on the verge of breaking into tears but she was also inching her head to see her mother's face a little more before she couldn't see her again 💔

These two clashed in just about every scene they shared, never able to see eye-to-eye. And now with Cassandra dead, Caitlyn will never have another chance to bridge the gap with her mother. So many things left unsaid. And This is so sad Imagine losing a parent who wasn't easy on you and yet she loves you so much

(she’s broken manipulated and vengeful)

[unabashednightmarepizza]

This is so sudden brainrot but imagine... That You, the Creator, are married with one of the Archons.

But the people never really saw You.

Warnings: Too much cheesiness in Venti's and Zhongli's part, only sadness in Ei's part, flangst in Furina's part, "Being human" problems in Furina's and Ei's part, Ei and Scara's "toxic" bond, slight mentions of abondenment, the reader being referred as "wife"

In Mondstadt, much like other nations, people had never seen their Creator. There were many monuments and statues all around their city, and they knew for a fact that there were even more in other ones, and people worshipped your name alongside their Lord Barbatos with pride, gratefulness and love.

The tale of your adventures together, the many battles you both fought side by side and brought their ancestors to victory, the way you both saved Mondstadt from the vengeful God Decarabian and later the corrupt society... But above all, the strong and unbreakable love you held for each other for centuries were told all around the city's lively streets.

Many stories, paintings, books were written in both of your names; told as both a warning and a heartwarming message.

Once, and even occasionally now, they were heard through their murmurs of praise and the Wind you and your beloved controlled.

Alongside that bard's tunes and melodic lyre where he declared his "unyielding and ever-strong love" for the Creator.

Blasphemous, really.

But the people just left him be. After all, if he trully angered You and Lord Barbatos, the bard wouldn't even be standing alive and rather striken down by bolts of thunder rather than being drunk all the time and sing songs about his devoted love for You as he was ready to give his all.

Diluc was trully going to strike him with his own claymore even if his beloved Creator didn't, and he would have the support of the whole city for doing so as the bard only giggled and played with the ring on his finger, one that was adorned with many jewels unknown to humans...

Which made people question Venti whether he robbed someone rich or he had someone rich buying all that stuff.

Basically a sugarmommy or something. One that needs to be either a God or, as absurt as it was, the Creator Themselves since he was living somehow a luxurious life with all those exclamations and all his debt to Master Diluc was suddenly payed.

Because come on,who would... Exclaim such vulgar and intimate things about Their Majesty, when They already have a husband?

The husband who very much so adores and worships the ground his spouse walks on, who is also very horny for Them and regularly makes love with Them which ends with two slightly exhausted but very pleased Gods wearing giddy smiles as giggles leave them, their hands still touching and proding against the other's body... There was a reason A Thousand Winds were important for the nation of freedom-

But, two things were enough for them to reconsider their decisions one day and send them into a heart attack that surely would put them in their grave early.

One: The fact that the Creator, not that they knew at that time, was drinking coffee happily while eating Mondstadt Hash Brown and Nothern Smoked Chicken in the Good Hunter while conversing with people normally as if they enjoyed hearing Diona complain about their alcohol and how bad it was for the health, all the while bouncing a very happy and excited Klee on Their knees as she rambled about her Dodoco.

And Two: Venti running up to that person, you, with a wide grin and kissing you while exclaiming a happy "Windblume, you are here! I missed you so much!"

Now, it wouldn't have been a big problem and shock. You see, it was two lovers happily hugging and greeting each other, exchanging loving kisses and stares as even the hearts of people around them were shook by how intense and strong it was. The elders were cooing at the cute scene, the shorter and petite looking bard hugging a tall and strong-looking person, a show of their contrast yet harmony as the person lovingly patted his head and kissed his soft cheeks like usual...

Had they not known Venti was their Archon Lord Barbatos who was married with... The Creator, like he exclaimed so in many of his drunkard monologues, and suddenly his pretty ring and life made sense as Jean fainted from witnessing the Holy love of her Gods and the truth behind Venti's real marriage to You, Lisa's eyes widened as a blush overtook her face and...

Well, chaos ensured.

"Windblume! You are here!" Venti exclaimed happily with reddened cheeks, both from his excitement and drunk self. You could only sigh softly at the fact that he once again drunk himself away, a tad bit disappointed at hım failing his promise once again even though he made great progress, yet you still caressed his face with lithe fingers as softly as possible with a frown.

And did Venti hate that sight with a burning passion.

All that mattered was you, for him. The You who still loved him despite his mistakes in the past and the hollow feeling that followed hım everywhere. The You who always reassured him that he deserves the happiness he now lives...

And He couldn't be more grateful to have it with you, for you to accept his love all those years ago, way before even humans were created.

And to his happiness, you finally came back after he spent painful years alone since another world needed your assistanfe. Sure he was "sleeping" while he was actually taking care of your daughter, playing with her all day to make up for the lost time and teaching her about the wind but you didn't have to know that!

You sure as hell did, and was getting ready to scold the shit out of him later for allowing and teaching your precious child foul words to insult people Barbatos didn't like.

"Yes, my beloved husband... Unforfunately, one of the universes needed my assistence immediately and another once-water-dragon needed some teaching. Poor boy, judged because he is the reincarnation of the previous Imbibitor Lunae..."

Venti only hummed thoughtfuly as he sat down next to you, twirling a Cecilia between his fingers with a soft smile since the once depressing sight of the flower was now of a happy and joyful sight that reminded him of hope, love and... Babypowder.

But there was also the fact that you had way too many adopted children. He liked your soft heart for children, he really did and he was also the same as you as he too "adopted" kids...

But was it not getting out of hand?

"Another one we're adopting? Don't you think-" he sweated nervously with a tilt of his head, pouting in thought at yet another sad child in his home though he didn't really hate the idea, not at all.

But the havoc caused by all the ruckus caused by them and his precious flower who loved those big brothers and sisters she had was giving him white hairs since he couldn't do something that would erase her cute smile, like getting angry at her and them for having fun and being free. What kind of father and God would he be then?

You saw the reluctance in his eyes as clear as the day, and you understood why he felt that way. At first, you also were reluctant to do what you have been doing for years now but one look at their sad and lifeless eyes that held no childlike wonder...

And you were suddenly hugging them all to your chest, swooping them up and giving them the best life possible.

Besides, you also learnt how to get under Barbatos' skin too!

You pouted at him cutely, getting closer to him and nuzzling your face to his neck teasingly as you landed a soft kiss to the juncture of his neck, softly nimbling on the tender skin as he groaned out and lightly threw his head back.

"You are making me crazy, Windblume..."

"Hmm, but you like it~ Besides, I know you like me happy and this kid also commands Wind-"

"Consider it done,Windblume! I wonder how Cecilia would react though."

Gotcha.

Just as quickly, he fell apart and his fake reluctance was replaced with fatherly affection at having yet another wind user at home to teach new skills as his hand thightened over yours and he stared at you after you lifted yourself from your place on his neck.

You smugly smirked with a hint of affection for his soft side as you kissed his lips softly, leaving him in a daze as he looked at you with a lopsided and lovesick smile.

That was why you loved him so much...

You laughed to yourself happily at how easy it was for him to accept anything and nothing that came from you, especially when it included mistreated children's care who was blessed by the wind.

Besides, he had a really hard time saying no to both you and those he considered as his children who had his vision... His own child wasn't an option because he never said no to her much to your dismay.

"Hmm? She is a lovely and friendly girl, she even befriended Neuvillette and adores when Zhongli tells her stories of the ancient times! I'm sure everything would be fine!"

Venti groaned at what you said, because though Zhongli and him were not on so good terms... It seemed his own daughter stabbed him from the back by liking her uncle Li's stories as much as her dad's and his own wife took great satisfication from making fun of him for it while drinking Osmanthus Wine as if the situation wasn't bad already.

Barbatos was just being dramatic in your opinion since your daughter generally loved reading and listening to other people's stories. Besides, Cecilia had a very big Dvalin plushie alongside the friends that shaped Mondstadt to its recent version, and refused to sleep without having them close to her and if that didn't say enough, her wearing the same clothes as his and even sometimes imitating her father did.

Which often ended up with a bawling Barbatos as he nuzzled to her, her doing the same to hım as they resembled a mama cat and her kitten.

"MAMA, PAPA! MAMA CAME BACK!" A shrill, excited cry came from the Gates as everyone's attention was turned for a second to the little toddler girl who suddenly zoomed to where you and Venti was, clinging onto you and nuzzling her face to yours as you laughed fondly and stared at her with eyes identical to hers that she inherited from you...

The stars that would always follow the Princess and the sign of Teyvat, on her inherited eyes shone the brightest as the people of Mondstadt met their Creator in the most affectionate way possible: Showcasing of the motherly love You held for the baby in your arms as Barbatos walked around the city you two built with the help of your now deceased friends proudly.

Proud for he was able to give Cecilia a future to hope for, a place for her to grow up without knowing the harshness of this world and how much blood was spilled for her and the future generation to grow and flourish, for them to never know tyranny and pain.

And that was also the day, the people of Mondstadt met the Priincess Cecilia of their Creator and Archon.

A lovely toddler who was loved and adored by Teyvat and all the universes.

A toddler that had the same love between her parents reflected in her eyes and smile.

And apparently, a toddler who loved apples as much as her dad, if not more, as the gremlin they were together.

"Cecilia, how many apples have you eaten today?" You raised your brows at her suspiciously innocent face, questioning her enormous pocket which you were sure held many apples for her to eat with her dad.

"Only 3, mama!" She smiled widely at you, unaware of the pocket dimension which seemed huge to the eye of a God, the one you added behind her dress because she loved picking things up and storing them as keepsakes.

"Besides the other 100 ones you have in your pocket dimension??"

A poignant silence settled between the three of you, as cricket sound was the only thing that could be heard. You stared at your daughter whose eyes widened at your question, shocked at how you knew of her secret stash, fondly and amused.

Poor baby, she still couldn't understand that you were the Creator of All and knew pretty much everything.

"...... I can explain, mama!"/ "Windblume, you can't punish her! Look at her cute face, and how adorable she is while holding the apples!"

And yes, indeed, you couldn't punish them because of how much you loved them both as Cecilia offered you two apples rather than one like she did to her dad, who only smiled and nodded as she said she loved you so so much, while you two walked out of the city to go and visit uncle Dvalin and you only shook your head in fake disappointment at he silliness of both your husband and daughter.

He agreed on that fact of Cecilia without complaints as he stared at your etheral smile. After all, Mondstadt was the epitome of his love for You.

Even if you didn't allow him to eat more apples-Besides, the artival of a New Princess would surely be rnough for hım.

With Liyue, it was way different.

Morax, or Zhongli as he now called himself, had begged you to take some days off with himself away in your lovely and cozy home on the outskirts of Liyue, away from the bustling crowd so that both him and your daughter could freely let go of their human appearance and waffle around with their dragon features.

A big contrast to the home he once had as Rex Lapis.

Now, there were two reasons for him wanting you have some rest. One, because he missed you. He missed those good old times when he would always sit with you in your balcony and watch the sun as his black and scaled hands clasped around your middle with your back resting on his chest, inhaling and exhaling softly to which he did the same.

He missed the days he got to spend with you as himself, not the human one but the true him. The dragon him, with amber horns that shone with each light hitting them. Tail so large and big yet also soft that it was a great blanket for you and Zhi.

His little girl, the one who showed the world of the love shared between the Creator and Rex Lapis, the fruit of thousands of years of love and marriage which was fated to continue to grow and get stronger.

You insisted that, at the time when you were pregnant upon your stubborness because you wished to experience it rather than just creating your child out of wisp, whatever gender the baby would be... They would be named after him.

He disagreed on that at first, to his and your shock since he never did such thing before even when his ideas and yours were completely opposite of each other.

To him, he was a monster that shed way too much blood. A God of War that killed many Gods, a God that was too harsh and even rude sometimes... Once a sinner that dared to challenge the Allmighty Creator of All.

And for all these reasons and more complicated ones, he always felt unworthy of the happiness and serenity he now has. He felt the guilt of his past actions often pricking at his mind at the deep of the night, all the screams and tears he made others let out plagued his already fragile mind as the others surrendered to the sweet embrace of sleep and he laid awake beside you, who only wished to take his pain and self-loathing away so that he could finally start living.

But for the longest time, you were unable to make him see the beauty of life and above all, himself.

However his little Zhi changed it all for him, with her fat cheeks and chubby arms and all smiles at him even when she hadn't opened her eyes to the worlds that waited with batted breaths yet.

Both Teyvat and that time's Liyue were so excited at the news of their Archon and Creator having their own child, true embodiment of love and power. Teyvat was sunny and shiny for days, and even if it rained, it was always a soft drizzle and never a hurricane.

And your people? They were so ecstatic as the city bubbled with life and happiness, with everyone preparing offerings, clothes, jewelries and toys for the uncoming heir. Rex Lapis toys, story books about you and your husband's adventure, teething toys (you didn't understand at first but now blessed the makers eternal happiness in the after life for it because boy, was it bad), you name it and the list went off.

As if all the gifts stopped there... All the Adeptus and even the level-headed Guizhong literally raced to be the baby's favourite auntie/uncle with the gifts or clothes or their plans of playing with them while you sat there next to your husband with an awkward smile, him stroking your bloated belly with a fatherly love as the baby kicked his hand happily, knowing it was the sweet hold of its dad...

All the while Alatus and Bosacius butted heads for what food and game were the best for the baby, Guizhong and Streetward Rambler sketched new toys while Menogias and Cloud Retainer already started their clothing plans to sew for later.

And the baby wasn't even born.

He still remembers the days he spent silently crying while holding one of the toys which was gifted from his people for his baby after it was declared that their nation would be blessed with a child of their Archon and Creator, holding onto the doll and imagined a daughter who played with it with a huge smile.

He knew any child of a loving marriage such as yours would be a blessing, especially since they would have your lovely features that he fell for a long time ago and still did, too. But his heart couldn't help but swell whenever he thought about having daughters who looked at him as if he hung the stars and tried to imitate you.

And no, his dragon instincts weren't playing a crucial role in his sudden need of many children and the thightness he felt in his pants whenever he saw you, his wife, walking around with a child between your arms in his and your land, with his wedding band that he crafted on your finger-

Yes, he wanted a girl to cuddle with and dote on so badly- even when most "men" only wished to have sons at an age when it was the expected behaviour and Zhongli never fit in, being "ridiculed" for his wish for an healthy child only, even if ridiculing him wasn't possible since he had a very sharp tongue when he wanted and he didn't care about fitting when he was the one who made the land, being the dad of his little girl was the greatest honorary title he ever .

And when little Zhi was born, with eyes wide with curiousity and wonder for the world around her, a smile wide enough to lighten up the whole universe as she gazed between you and her dad who was just sobbing at the innocence on her face and the cute baby fat all around her body as he held his whole life between his arms...

Morax made the biggest and most important contract of forever, after his promise to forever love and cherish you.

To always be there for his girl and protect her from any harm, so that the smile she wore the first day she was welcomed in Teyvat as it rejoiced at the arrival of the little princess, would forever remain on her face.

And the second reason was... Well...

"Let me get this straight: You wanted to retire for good and therefore faked your own death, are now a funeral consultant who happens to have met with one of my vessels from another world and all of this mess happened right before Zhi started showing her dragon side and saw her dad 'dying'?"

You deadpanned at Zhongli as he winced awkwardly from the loud cries of his precious baby daughter who clinged onto your legs, drawing slight Holy Golden Blood that belongt to you. He felt like the filthiest lower form on the surface of Teyvat as tears fell down her cheeks in huge globs, her whimpers filling the empty room as the sky roared angrily outside with its harsh wisps of storm and rain hitting the windows as if they wanted to get inside and punish him for making "the Princess of Teyvat" cry as the people outside tried to find a shelter.

And was the ground shaking or was it his imagination?

Even though her claws hurted your human skin and caused you to hiss in pain, you couldn't care less since your daughter was the most uncomfortable she had ever been, with her cheeks wet from the tears for her "father's death"...

Even with the cute little horns and claws, alongside the huge slitted amber eyes she definetly inherited from her father that you loved more than anything made her impossible to resist, you were still angry at Zhongli and neither her nor his puppy eyes would work on you.

"I understand your need for rest but we need more than a vacation now, Morax! We need therapy! She thinks you're gone and-" you frailed your arms around angrily while pointing between her and him, when you were interrupted by your daughter's soft voice and hiccups.

"Māma? Bàba is gone? He won't c-come?" Zhi whimpered as she clutched the plushie of the dragon form of her dad thightly to her chest, the item being her only comfort at the moment as your heart broke for the tears falling down her amber eyes as stars dimmed inside of them.

Heh, at least she has that feature from me even though she is a replica of her dad...

"No, love... Bàba isn't gone, he is just being silly." You gritted your teeth slightly to Zhongli as you led Zhi away while looking over your shoulder at him threateningly.

A glare that sent chills down his spine, as Zhongli knew the hidden meaning behind it even after thousands of years being together

You better find a way to fix this or else...

And you know what they say: Happy wife, happy life.

And in Zhongli's case: Happy wife, happy child and happy universes...

With Fontaine, it was after Focalors' plans were revealed to the people and Fontaine was saved with Your and Focalors' combined powers and help. The people lived, the children and friends you had made were safe and all of them were alive as they hugged the closest person to them happily, praising your and Focalors name as they prayed and thanked you both...

At the cost of your lover's life.

You humorlessly chuckle as rain falls down your face and mixes with your tears, head hung low on the last stage you two could ever have as the heaviness of the situation slowly dawned on you.

It seems loosing who I love the most is a frequent occurance.

Now, one might question why the All-Creator wasn't just simply bringing her lover back to life or just not will her death to stop. As the Creator, you were supposed to be that powerful and nothing should disobey you... Well, they were all true facts about your being but you couldn't just do it because you promised her.

After everything was over, and the time you dreaded which was the end of this masqurade had finally come... She said she was just too exhausted to continue as an Archon beside you and asked if it was allright to rest.

Maybe as any other person would do, but not as an Archon... She couldn't keep going anymore.

Besides, Fontaine no longer needed an Archon. They were strong on their own as well, and she knew that if Celestia dared to go against your command once more... You would protect them and the rest of the Teyvat fiercely.

"I wish to rest, my dear... If you will be allright without me and there wouldn't be a problem?" She asked softly with her much smaller hands gently caressing your saddened face, wiping the few stray tears that fell down on your cheeks. Your heart hurt way too much, at how easy it was for her to recognize your tears from the heavy rain that poured down, at how soon enough... You would loose the person that knew you the best, always stood next to you at harsh times and put a smile on your face with her antics.

Teyvat cried alongside you for the pain their Creator felt as the guillotine that would take her away from you floated above you.

It was ready to destroy itself if you commanded, that magicial execution weapon didn't like the idea of killing its Archon and the beloved of the Creator, even though you weren't at your full power...Any being, alive or not, bent the knee to you after all but, if there was something stronger than the Will of the Creator...

It was the wish of Her lover, whom She was ready to do anything for and who wished to depart with an excellent last show.

After all, how could you resist her when she asks you so sweetly with her loving and different-colored eyes?

"Then, as your lover... I shall make your wish come true. You may rest, my love, until your soul is ready to come back to the world I created with so much love." You tearfully exclaimed, hands coming up to take a hold of hers as your lips locked with her own and then landed on her forehead tenderly for the last time. As the fact that this was the last time you would stare at her eyes, witness her dramatic plays, see your reflection in her eyes filled with love for you finally dawned on...

You silently broke.

You had this much of previlege, right? Who said the Creator couldn't grieve? Maybe you couldn't outwardly show weakness to your people, but at least you had Teyvat reflecting your true emotions...

But just as you were suffering, there was another one who had been suffering for 500 years in silence. From having to pretend as someone she wasn't, putting on the mask of the strong Archon who did her best to entertain her people so that they weren't worried about the prophecy...

But above all, from pretending not to be in love with the one person she wasn't supposed to fall for.

"I have loved you for this cruel 500 years, Your Grace. Even when I knew your heart belongt to another, one that I pretended to be for many years in hopes to have you..." she hung her head down in shame and sadness as she whispered to the wind, unaware of you listening to her with a thight heart as she stood on the balcony that looked at the horizon of Fontaine.

Though a part of you still loved Egeria and Focalors, grieved their death and often refused any exclamations of your obvious love for the "puppet" version of her...

Now, you couldn't help but agree with everyone and even Focalors, as you stared at Furina's back with a saddened yet soft smile.

"No, I don't have feelings for her, Focalors!" You denied her obvious teasing, although she raised a brow at your flushed face with a smirk.

"It's okay to have feelings for two people at the same time, love! Even more so when It's you, the All-Creator!"

"Focalors!" You bursted out with a hand clutching your chest in embarrasment, dress flowing behind you with each movement as you ran away from her teasing remarks as she laughed at your misery which put a smile on your face even when your body said otherwise.

What a good melody it was as her light laugh resonated in your Chambers...

"What? I'm sure there are others who wish to be your consort so badly!" She rolled over on your bed, laying on her stomach as her feet kicked back and forth happily, her fingers twirling her hair as she gazed at your back, biting her lips but mind actually busy with... This new revelation.

Focalors had always been a different kind. When all the other Archons were either greedy or keen on fighting, she loved scheming her plans and watching in silence from the shadows. That way, most thought of her to be powerless and not strong enough to be an Archon... Unaware of the fact that sometimes brains was much stronger than brawn and they were being imbeciles by not noticing this.

And that fact was what attracted you to her in the first place, eventually resulting with a happy and Holy unity of two person in love much to Focalors enjoyment as she rubbed it on her fellow Archons' face.

But in this new case, although she was surprised by the turn of events, she was fine with sharing You... With her humane prototype Furina.

Someone she was very fond of, even though she was created to act like the Hydro Archon herself... Someone Focalors was proud to create who was slowly becoming what she always aspired Furina to be.

Human.

"Alright, fine! I get it! So what if I have feelings for her? It's not like-"

"You should confess to her."

You still remembered how Focalors smiled softly at that time, no hatred or dislike or even jeaolusy evident on her face as she encouraged you to follow your heart, knowing the truth behind your protective stance concerning your feelings for Furina.

She knew how this plan would end, deceiving the rogue Heavenly Principles never came without a price... And she didn't want you to be alone when it happened, didn't want your kind heart to harden with grief and loneliness.

Furina would be much better of a wife for you, than Focalors could ever be. After all, what kind of wife would give up on her own spouse just when they would have their happily ever after?

At that time, such absurdity repulsed you.

You, having feelings for another? Yet alone someone who was created to deceive your traitor of a first creation Celestia?

Ridiculous.

Not that you thought of her to be ridiculous because she was obviously adorable whenever a new human invention or music excited her and she came to you, begging you to accompany her so that she could understand humans better since you were the one who created such complex yet intriguing beings.

And definetly not that you decided that blue suited her well, when you introduced her to new clothings that complemented her in the best way possible.

"Now, I see that I could never be that... If only true love was enough..."

But poor Furina, now completely human and free, didn't know about any of this. She still was a prisoner in her own cruel mind which yelled self-deprecating and harsh words to her, mocking her for falling for her God.

It wasn't even her intention to be created that way. She didn't mean to fall for your kindness and unconditional love, not when she knew she received them because she was created to replace your lover as the Archon of Fontaine. She knew you only spent time with her because Focalors probably asked you to, because you and her had to get along well for the next 500 years as Focalors remained in shadows for the plan you two made to work.

She knew she would be thrown aside as soon as her part of the play was over...

Yet, her heart still beated hard whenever your eyes found hers and she held onto your hand at times she was afraid.

She still fell for you hopelessly whenever you patiently watched and listened to her plays and antics, and even cracked a smile whenever she forgot what she was supposed to say.

And whenever she saw that smile and hear that laugh, it was like she had become more human as more time she spent in your presence.

But defeated she was, she knew it was impossible to have you for real. At least now that she lost all of the godly power she held and Fontaine was safe from the evil clutches of Celestia as you prepared to go and face Them.

Your Shades.

But, as the once-God-of-Justice... She was wrong about one thing, one thing you felt guilty about: The fact that she thought of herself to be unworthy of You, when it was possibly the other way around.

Indeed, if only she knew the truth... That You held her at the highest position in your heart, which had been the case for 500 years unknown to both you and her.

"I doubt she is strong enough for all these, Focalors... However, such fragile thing yet even if she faces many hardships, she is perfectly human." You idly traced patterns on her arm as she laid next to you in your realm, humming quietly while she relaxed back onto you. You couldn't help but let out a chuckle at her kitten-like behaviour, nuzzling to you while you inhaled her flowery scent...

Though your thoughts were cut short when another set of heterochromatic eyes came to your mind, the same color as the one between your arms... But more humane, more expressive... One that made you fall in love and gaze at for a long time as the sun framed her face in the most ethereal way...

You froze when you realized an affectionate smile lifted your lips up, shaking your head as your heart started to pick up. Suddenly, her excited smile whenever you brought another set of sweets from another world for her to try, or the rare curious and not teasing stare while she munched on food as she listened to what you said with passionate eyes, as if she wished to hear more of you, be in your presence more...

Or that one time when she was just so close for you to lean down and capture her lips-

And the woman next to you heard the exact moment you realized your feelings in your heart.

As if she knew your inner thoughts, she slowly rose up and stared down at your thoughtful eyes with loving ones as her hand caressed your cheeks, making you close your eyes in peace with the calming sound of water almost lulling you to sleep. "Is she weak in your eyes for it?"

Focalors was an Archon, blessed with just a tiny part of your power, but she was able to see right through you. She knew you had been harbouring some kind of... Attraction towards a certain eccentric one that was also too bad at hiding her own feelings as she quite literally hung off of you every chance she got, much to her amusement.

What was even funnier was the fact that you too, though the Creator, were quite bad at hiding your feelings as well and if she needed to be the one to step up and make you realize them soon, Focalors was going to make it come true in one way or another.

"She simply... Amazes me with the strength of her will." you stopped to ponder for an answer for the best words to describe your thoughts, without showing much of your raging emotions. It wasn't a lie after all, the way she sacrificed herself for her people simply amazed you and made your affections grow for the girl. Knowing this, Focalors only giggled knowingly as you rolled your eyes at her when a question whose answer was very obvious and tenderly uttered by you, left her lips.

"And what would you do if all of this ends one day?"

"I'd still be there for her until the end of time..."

"I know you're listening, Your Grace..."

You chuckled under your breath at how she still held some powers of her, though you weren't surprised since she was the secret beloved of the Creator and therefore, the world still blessed her with powers; as you stepped away from your place in the shadows, heels slowly clicking against the marble floor. You soon came to a stop next to her, looking at the rejoicing people of Fontaine who were praying to and thanking both her and You, staring at the horizon together.

Dreading what needed to be said, even if the harsh truth would break her heart, as you looked at her from the side.

"I loved and still love Focalors, Furina."

She sniffled, nodding her head in understanding. She already knew that and prepared herself for the rejection she would have to face. She was happy that her people was safe and happy, that the prophecy didn't happen and destroy her nation...

But, did she not deserve happiness too? Didn't she shed enough tears silently by herself? She didn't even know what she was supposed to do with her new life given to her, a free life for her to enjoy and do as she liked...

With the person she loved the most.

Your heart twisted painfully at her crystal eyes glossing over, which made you question yourself for a second if that was the right way to confess. You were so sure Focalors was laughing her ass off at one point up there, watching this comedic scene quite amused but right now, you needed to take a step to both of your's happiness and make things right as you took a hold of her hand that stood next to her side idly and sighed.

Here we go...

"But I also love you." She whipped her head as soon as she processed your words, eyes immediately focusing on your form that was just a few feet away from her. Her eyes noticed you wearing the Hydro Sigil Necklace she specifically gifted you with, different colored blue hues mixing together in harmony as the stars of Teyvat complemented your face alongside that necklace that shone with the light of a new day in the most perfect way.

The necklace which was the proof of her first doing as Furina and not the Hydro Archon, without any saying from Focalors.

"Y-Your Grace? W-What does it-"

"Did you really think I didn't know the truth about your and Focalors plan? I was the one who suggested it and she was the one who progressed it!.. It seems I truly have a weakness when it comes to Hydro girls!" You joyfully exclaim with a giggle, watching as her face turned pale before a deep crimson took over. Her mind turned to literal mush, unable to comprehend the sudden turn of events.

Was this one of her wild dreams where she was just... happy with you? No consequences?

But no, this was very much so real as she looked down at your joined hands together and stared into your eyes.

" You have always wanted to have someone listen to your struggles, your pain and burdens, right?" Furina couldn't help the squeak that left her, hurriedly nodding her head as she allowed her tears to fall freely after your next words, hugging you thightly as her tears soaked your gown.

"After years of watching you grow in yourself as the woman who loves all kind of sweets and a knack for being dramatic... The innocent human who endured everything we have planned, unfortunately... I can't help but confess that I had fallen deeply for you."

"Therefore, I shall be that person. Forever, if you wish?" You gracefully took a hold of her slender and smaller hands, finger tips caressing her smooth and soft skin as if it was a fine china. Her heart, now human heart that was free of its shackles, swelled with love with each stroke your hands did.

And her heart caved in, her tears falling down on her cheeks and down to your palm gracefully as she gave a sincere smile amidst her own pain and relief, a smile of the happiness she was starting to have.

"I... That would be a great happiness, Your Grace." You chuckled affectionately, stroking her cheek with the tip of your finger as you landed a kiss on her forehead.

"None of that now... Y/N would do just fine." She beamed visibly at you and nodded, looking at the people below with a new kind of hope blooming inside her chest.

Maybe things would be better from now on?

"By the way, short hair really suits you well, love." You cheekily exclaimed with arms around her waist, hugging her from behind as you stared at the redness coating her cheeks.

Oh, yes... Everything would definetly be better for good.

With Inazuma, things weren't so good unforfunately because of the tense and rocky relationship You and Ei had.

When you had to go on a long work trip where you were to see from close how other universes were doing, not seeing your innocent and loving son with your wife wasn't on your "Top Ten Things to See When I Return" list.

Neither seeing the hunted Visions on your Statue was, as your children were in pain, crying and begging for you to come back and kneeling in front of...

"What's the meaning of this, Ei?"

When the citizens of Inazuma heard their Creator's voice as warmth and comfort engulfed them and freed them from the shackles that kept them bound to the ground, they failed to notice the edge in your tone or rather chose to ignore it.

The angry, scared yet disappointed edge as Teyvat rumbled beneath the feet of people and sky roared above them... All the while Ei stood in front of your shrine with an unreadable and cold face.

This, wasn't Ei... This couldn't be the woman you loved and had a child with...

Child... Baby... Son... Kunikuzushi...

Your eyes widened in fear for your little son, as there was no sight of him and you couldn't feel his presence in the city anymore. Panic overtook your face, heart dropping to your stomach at the possibility of Ei doing something she would regret later and guilt filling your every part at not being more mindful of how she was before you left.

It couldn't have been that bad, enough for her to do something stupid to him... Right?

Damn, you never imagined her hurting Kunikuzushi... She always seemed so loving and affectionate with him, perhaps she was a good actor.

"Ei, where is my Kuni? Where is my son?"

Ei continued to stare at your face as you begged her for answers desperately. Though it was another puppet of her, you could always sense and feel Ei in her and right now, you knew that behind the cold and irritating stare...

She, too, was breaking apart.

But surprisingly enough... You didn't care much about it, your only concern right now was your son. You didn't care that you referred to him as only your son and not hers.

She lost that previlege a long time ago, it seemed.

"He was too human..."

And that was enough to tell you what Ei had done.

You staggered back with a sob, eyes filling with scorching tears as your heart suddenly stopped from the spikes threatening to tear you apart. Even as a God, you weren't pain-proof and at that moment, you wished nothing more than not being able to feel that crashing pain.

Your hand instinctively went up to the necklace your baby son gifted you after a merchant saw him looking at it with huge amazement. Now, the old lady wasn't a fool as to not know who the boy that held stars in his wide and innocent purple eyes was.

Many even wondered where that kindness,sweetness and innocence came from when their Archon was usually... Aloof.

But they agreed that it must have come from you, his other parent and the one he loved and clinged on the most... The Creator that created the worlds with utmost love, selflessnes and kindness unmatched.

And they were right, as Kunikuzushi pointed to the purple and dark blue pendant with a loud coo and wide smile as his cheeks-still filled with baby fat- was reddened by the weather made him look even more cute and made the passerby's eyes fill with tears at the cute display, he kindly asked how much he needed to have the necklace for his mama. Some clenched their hands in cuteness agression, wanting to hug the baby thightly and pinch his cheeks...

But they knew they would be striken down by the Shogun if they did it... Though some still dared to pat his purple tufts of hair, knowing that their Creator never minded and rather loved the affection Their people gave to Their son, the Prince of Teyvat.

"I bough' fo' you, mama! How does it looks?" Kunikuzushi innocently asked as Ei and you looked at the toddling baby fondly who showed his newest treasure proudly with a shy smile, yet a bit insecure since he took a look at the many jewelries you had at home and thought you wouldn't like his gift.

You tenderly smiled from your position on the bed with hugging Ei and let him plop down on your lap, nuzzling to your chest like a kitten as he stared up at you with fullblown eyes, especting an answer from you with his little heart pounding in his chest excitedly.

He only got a tearful smile and a heart filled with unconditional love for him.

"Perfect, my lovely Kuni... Mama loves you so much... So, so much..." You hugged your son thightly to yourself, your heart constricting painfully for some unknown reason as if something bad was bound to happen...

But you foolishly didn't listen to your heart that told you to take a good look at your wife, who looked at the smiling toddler on your lap with somewhat sudden, cold eyes...

Though both of you shared the same parental love for the boy, unforfunately for you and Kunikuzushi... Ei had more plans for him and therefore wanted him to be perfect for it but his humanity was making him unperfect, whereas he was already perfect in your eyes for his humanity...

For his love and wonder for the world around him, his love for you in the most simple act you did... Fear for the unknown but feeling still safe because he knew his mama would be there to protect him from any bad guys and danger! You did it many times with the treasure hoarders, or the Hilichurls and assassins!

So, where were you? Why did you not come when he needed you, called for you, cried for you to save him from this so-called Doctor? Did you too abandon him because he made you upset?

In the end, you failed Kunikuzushi... You failed in every possible thing about him when you couldn't protect him from his own mother, the one who should have loved him and did everything in her power to keep him happy and smiling wide.

You failed at noticing Ei not being in her right mind and at being there for your family.

And now, you all were paying the price.

"And that is why he was perfect... I guess, just not for you." you gritted out angrily as you too pulled your sword out at the same time as she did, not seeing the tears that shone on her porcelain skin and regret for what she had done all those years ago washing over her.

Your disappointed face right before she scumbed to your power and will was only the cherry on top, as she kneeled on both knees in front of you, her hand discarding the katana that slained many living beings as her whole life slowly was torn apart by none other than her destructive hands and doings.

"I trusted the mother of my son... Just for you to abandon him and make him also believe I abandoned him too in this already painful life... Because I thought no harm would ever come to him, least I thought it would be from my own wife."

It seemed that your Ei had become someone else, and she held no value to neither your son who was the happy outcome of your marriage with her, nor You anymore... And even if she cried tears of river, she would never be able to convince you otherwise.

"I will find him and beg for his forgiveness..." you muttered weakly before you turned your back to her for good, at least until things calmed down, as you descended down on the shrine that once witnessed both your union and also the creation of your son...

And now, your departure.

"My love..." Ei weakly mumbled from behind you, finally realizing the severity of what she had done and now, lost... as your emotionless eyes found hers from below the stairs, dress dancing through the wind as if to mock her for her mistakes and failures, she understood that maybe it was her fault.

First her sister, then her friends, then her son and now... You.

The one she always loved from the beginning and swore herself to for Eternity...

She ruined everything, every good thing that ever happened to her because she was either late or didn't see the true value of those in her life...

Like the family you two had created, what should have been a new purpose and a second chance for her was now only another regret in her list of numerous mistakes.

"I'm not going to let him walk down on this path alone... Goodbye for now, Ei." you willed yourself not to look at her shivering form, you knew you couldn't take the sight in. Though you acted cold right now, a part of you still loved her deeply. That part still yearned for her and her heart that she insisted she buried a long time ago, that part still wished to see the small smile as you gifted her with yet another treat and kissed all over her face, later showing how much you truly loved her...

They all seemed so far away now, all those happy days were long gone...

Neither you nor her turned back to take one look at the other as she too retreated back to her Plane of Euthymia, or thought back to the abandoned dreams you both had as all the good memories suddenly started to fade away and you disappeared in front of her eyes to find your son, as you made it clear, and she didn't hold any grudges for the way you angrily spitted out for she too, felt ashamed for what she had done.

And perhaps you both always walked on different paths from the beginning...

She, to a path of Eternity in which she lost herself.

And You, to a path of mending whatever was left of your family and hoping to find your son.

[morganas-pendragons]

All My Love | Twelfth Doctor

@pompeiianbollockr

Set during the blindness arc in Season 10 because I love me some vulnerable Doctor. I don't care if it's not in Twelve's character. He gets to be vulnerable because I SAID so :D

He hasn't spoken to you since before you landed on the space station. In fact, it's been nearly a week. It's been nearly a week since The Doctor allowed himself to kiss you. To touch you.

And possibly the most devastating part.. to see you.

Self sacrificial. That was one of the best words you'd ever used to describe him in the time you'd known this face. This face. With all its quirks, and all the things he hates about it: The attack eyebrows, the lines, the wrinkles and the age... Despite all the things he'd hated about this face, the one thing he'd learned from traveling with you is that the faces didn't matter.

He truly believed you loved him for him. You knew it. He knew it. This, though... This was something he wasn't sure he was going to come back from. The Doctor had spent centuries gallivanting across the universe, running further and faster from home because he couldn't dare look back, with promises of adventures on his lips and desperation for escape in his heart.

"Tell me... am I a good man?"

You scooted closer to where he was sitting on the stairs and tentatively rose your hand to graze your fingertips across his temple and card through those unruly silver curls. He shivered at the sensation and forced his eyes open to meet yours as you leaned in to whisper in his ear, "The best man I will ever know."

He hasn't forgotten the feeling of your lips meeting the skin under his ear. Or the first time he'd kissed you of his own accord. Or the first time you'd marked him in the dead of night in his bedroom, where your lips had branded his skin. The way he'd linked your fingers together on either side of your head.

The sound of your voice calling his name. The sound of your voice in general, so soft and sweet and good...

That is something he clings to so tightly now. All the memories of the past - mere years for you, millions of years for him - that had opened his eyes to the truth: Despite all his misgivings and all his failures, he too was someone deemed worthy of loving.

You had brought a light into his life that The Doctor had not realized he'd been so deprived of. It was the light of humanity, of hope, of a heart far too big for this universe that nobody would ever thank you for. You deserved so much better than him.

And yet, you didn't want better.

You only wanted him.

He can't figure out why he's so... sad. There's an empty hole in his hearts and his mind where someone used to be, where the memory and the love of someone he cared for used to occupy, and the realization he cannot place who they are is angering him.

The Doctor has always been vengeful. The Oncoming Storm, The Valeyard, Timelord Victorious. He has rage written into the very essence of his bones and a desire to protect and save people in a way no one had ever saved him from himself.

"Hey you," You dragged your fingers across his shoulder blades as you came to sit beside him in the open doorway of the TARDIS. "Where did you go?"

That was one of the things he'd first recognized he loved about you. Despite this body having difficulties with physical affection and intimacy, he'd learned how to communicate with body language and gazes. Absent looks. Looks of adoration. Affection. Longing. That was all it took.

And you still read him like a book.

"Something's missing," He lightly knocked on his temple as you reached out and took his hand in your own. The Doctor let you. It was like he could feel the sunlight and warmth seeping from you into him. The light overwhelming the dark. "In here. There's someone who's supposed to be in here with the rest of them. I don't remember."

You did. You did, and Clara had made you promise before she flew away that you would never help him remember. That you would help him carry the weight.

"Maybe you're not supposed to. We're all stories in the end," You whisper. The Doctor softened as he lifted your hand to his lips and tentatively brushed them against your knuckles. "And maybe some of those stories become songs. Whispers of melodies and lines that hold the things we cannot remember."

All of his memories are composed in a form of music: Lines upon lines of melancholic notes in the minor key that is his endless life, with crescendos of bright notes meant to convey the optimism and light brought by the companions who travel alongside him.

And when they leave, the decrescendo extends over what feels like years, softening to a singular note that eases into silence.

Him, alone, on his own battlefield. That's how he feels right now. Battling the recognition that he may never be able to bask in the light again. That he may always be victim to the darkness.

So The Doctor lets the darkness win. He distances himself from you because it's better to face the darkness alone.

However, you are not willing to let him.

***

You know him. You know him better then you know yourself, and you have known him long enough to know his tells when it comes to how he keeps his secrets. How he lets himself lie. You are the only person who is able to truly see The Doctor.

You would be lying if you said you weren't hurt by his sudden distance. He hadn't done this since he'd recently regenerated. When he'd been resentful of his new body, of the world, and of who he was now.

You had lost count of all of the times that you had followed the sound of grief and heartache and despair into the darkness of his bedroom. All the times he'd turned you away. All the times he'd left you out in the cold of the TARDIS hallways.

All the times he'd finally given in and allowed himself to be held.

You'd been longing to do that again. To be the one being held, to be reminded that he did indeed still love you. The Doctor always went on about having ''a duty of care'' for you and for Bill.

Did your self hatred overwhelm your duty of care, Doctor? Did the coward finally win?

When Bill and Nardole had disappeared, you had stayed behind with The Doctor when he'd attempted to read the Veritas. You had been right around the corner when you were alarmed by the sound of pained groaning coming from within the cage.

"Cardinal, it worked. I can see. Not well enough. Not yet."

Dread bubbled low in your stomach as you approached the cage from behind. Hadn't his blindness been cured? What was he talking about?

"Think about the universes. Whatever you need, you can always borrow." He blinked heavily. Once, twice, three times to try and clear the haze from over his eyes. You were standing just outside of his peripheral vision. He wouldn't be able to tell you were there. And after shutting you out, after days of nothing.. This upset you. This hurt. "As long as you pay it back. I just borrowed from my future. I get a few minutes of proper eyesight, but I lose something. Maybe all my future regenerations will be blind. Maybe I won't regenerate ever again. Maybe I'll drop dead in twenty minutes, but... I will be able to read this."

He slammed his hand on top of the Veritas. You weren't paying attention anymore. The next thing you knew, the lights were going out, and you were running to keep up with him even though he did not know you were there.

You tried not to let your hurt show. Or for him to hear it in your voice.

That would come later.

***

When all was said and done, you found him in the console room. He was still adjusting to learning how to identify when people were approaching based off of his other senses. It took The Doctor a moment to recognize the sound of footsteps approaching, but he did turn from his seat on the pilot's chair nearest to the console to where he thought you were standing.

He also didn't know that you were very aware he was still blind.

"Darling? Is that you? You should know that I always know it's you. Don't be coy."

"I'm mad at you."

His brow rose at that. "And why would that be?"

You walked forward to stand in the natural part of his legs. "For all of the times you have dragged me across the universe," You begin, swallowing your fear as you take both his hands and settle them on your hips while you settle in his lap. "For all the times I have had with you, the years I have known you. I never thought you'd be this thick."

The Doctor snorted. Did you not know this face? He was ridiculously thick headed.

"You should know by now that I am extremely thick," He argued, allowing his fingers to drift under the fabric of your cotton shirt and drum lightly against your hips. "Thick headed and arrogant and a selfish old man."

"An old man who forgot the first promise we ever made." You have yet to touch him. To properly touch him. ''Tell me. When did you forget?"

He struggled to keep hold of those memories. The early ones. When one has an infinite life, you do your best to hold onto what is precious.

"You can't." The Doctor had declared. It had been mere weeks since he'd regenerated, and he was so unsure, so scared. He did a remarkable job of hiding it. "You can't love me."

It was also the first time you'd properly been able to communicate how you felt to him. Eleven had called you, desperate and longing and begging you to understand, to remember that he's still The Doctor despite having a different face.

You had never had the courage to tell his younger face that you loved him. When Eleven had helped you to recognize the fear underneath that worn, aged face, you'd walked right back into the TARDIS and declared it with all the courage of a soldier facing a battlefield alone.

"I do love you. I have loved you. It took a while for me to recognize it, but I do. It's not a lie. It's not a trick or deception. It's me." You took your hand and placed it on his chest. He winced, though briefly, because this body was not quite ready to accept more physical contact than that. "Being brave."

"Promise me then. No secrets. No tricks." He murmured. You took the opportunity to close the gap of space between you, keeping your hand in its place as his grey eyes met yours. You shivered as he brought his own hand up to cradle your jaw. Your lips parted on their own accord as his eyes flickered down to them before slowly dragging his gaze upward to meet your own. "Promise me that you will keep them safe."

"Them?"

"Those fragile, beating things you've held in your hands since we met. Tell me," His breath fanned across your face as he hesitantly leaned inward. "What does it feel like to hold a Timelords hearts?"

"I asked you to keep me safe," The Doctor remarked. "That's not your job. It was an unrealistic promise."

"You're forgetting the beginning of that promise," You finally leaned inward enough that The Doctor could feel the rise and fall of your chest, the warmth of your breath against his cheek. He froze as you lightly tapped his sonic glasses. "No secrets. Take them off."

He did not move for almost a minute and a half. The Doctor knew that he should've seen this coming. He should've known you were clever enough to figure him out.

He removed one hand from under your shirt and removed the glasses willingly. Your heart hammered painfully hard in your chest as you were greeted with the familiar grey of his eyes. This time, however, they were cloudy. They were almost... dark.

"It never went away. I just didn't know how to properly tell you." The Doctor shrugged. "You deserve better. It's as I've said. Selfish old man, traveling across the universe with his best-"

He paused as you pressed a fingertip to his lips. The Doctor hummed and kissed your finger, reveling in the feeling of warmth tracing his face reverently.

"I wish you'd just told me." You murmured. You pressed yourself closer, dragging his hand up your hip until his thumb was pressing hard enough against your skin to feel your heartbeat. "You know me better than this. I love you. You have all my love."

"Even without my sight?" He asked. "I can't... I can't see you. And it's devastating."

That was a peculiar way to describe it. "What could be devastating about that?"

"You really don't know, do you?" He replied. You took both of his hands and slowly lifted them to your face, setting his thumbs against the curve of your lips. "It's hard to come to terms with the darkness winning when you've learned to love the light."

Oh.

"You can't see me," You whisper. You shiver as he drags his fingers across your mouth slowly, allowing them to travel across your face. "But you can learn how to find the light again. Darkness isn't forever."

You spent what felt like hours in silence after that. The Doctor allowed himself to drink in the warmth for the first time in ages, humming as you allowed him to relearn your face. The shape of your eyes. The sweep of your nose, the curve of your lips, the texture of your hair under his fingers.

When he was done, your breath caught as he tangled his fingers in your hair and dragged your head back just enough to expose the slope of your neck. "My love," His voice rumbled deep in his chest. "Tell me, what does it feel like?"

It took you a moment to find your voice as he lowered his head to drag his teeth across your pulse point, followed by the warmth of his lips that elicited a shiver from deep within you. "What does.. What does what feel like, Doctor?"

The last thing he says is, "Being the light." Before he's capturing your lips with his own, and the light overcomes the darkness once again.

[sexiestpodcastcharacter]

Sexiest Podcast Character — Scripted Bracket — Round 5

Propaganda

Captain Isabel Lovelace (Wolf 359):

Her everything <3 But in all seriousness WHAT is more sexy than a haunted, competent, funny, cursed, vengeful, mourning, badass, doomed woman?

listen to the run and hide speech and tell me that isn't the sexiest thing you've ever heard

Hot space lady who could kill me mmm yes please!

(sort of) twice-undead space captain who wired a bomb to her heart to make sure the crew of her ship didn't kill her before her escape shuttle got working. she's funny she's a genius she knows how to use a gun and she cares very much about her crew (despite the whole bomb thing).

#LOVELACE #idk who she’s up agaunst really tbf #but she cares so SO much #she gets boiled down to ’tough scary lady hot’ a lot (which 100% agree) but #she is heartbroken about her failure to keep her crew safe #and stubbornly wants to make sure none of it is in vain #even if it kills her #HOT. ​even apart from how hot her monologues and threats to hilbert are #also her and eifel laughing and getting along when they first meet her 😭 yall #anyway. lovelace 1000%. the defense rests

Vote Lovelace cuz of the way she says "Hi honey, I'm home" to the bastard who shot her in the head, and then how she proceeds to beat him up <3 Oh. And how she twists his arm and says "good boy". Yeah.

LOVELACE SWEEP LOVELACE SWEEP GO LISTEN TO HER RUN AND HIDE SPEECH AND WEEP THAT GODDARD AERONATICS EVER KILLED HER ENTIRE CREW AND ALSO HER (she recovered) AND MADE HER THEIR ENEMY

#LOVELACE SWEEP. DO NOT FUCKING LET ME DOWN #Lovelace is so much to me #Seen some people in the notes citing the run and hide speech#Which is very good #but my personal favorite Lovelace thing is variations on a theme #The cyclical nature of trauma #The lack of trust #The fear #the sadness #‘You can never go home. You were home. And now you’re back— and you can never go back.’ #Lovelace hearing Hera say something to her and #Thinking ‘what she’s actually saying is that I’m a demon and she would be glad to kill me in a slow and horrifying manner’ #Is so #I don’t agree that Lovelace is doomed either #Like #lovelace did die. But #She got out of that pain and trauma #How do you listen to her say that she is Isabel Lovelace #That she rejects the person that pain made her to be #And say she’s doomed

captain lovelace helped 12yo me realise I like women. She’s so hot. her threatening Hilbert is the sexiest thing I’ve ever heard. isabel lovelace SWEEP

Mina Murray (Re: Dracula)

As the winner of the Dracula sexyman bracket which ran before brackets were even a huge thing on tumblr and as a podcast character sort of now that re:Dracula is a podcast I think she deserves a place in this bracket

I would kill for Mina I would die for Mina etc

Mina helped everyone kill Dracula with her reports and memorization of the train schedules!

Mina got her mind invaded in order to be used as a puppet, and she took advantage of it by uno reversing the mind link to hunt down and kill her tormentor. Twice a day she gets into a state of being buried alive to achieve it. She dreads vampirism yet she's using her vampirism to her advantage. Her man vowed to become a vampire for her. He hates vampires. Yet he will offer his throat to her only.

Mod Note: This poll is about podcast characters, please only vote and offer propaganda for the Mina Murray in Re: Dracula.

[infinityroom]

I'm so sad to see this go. You created a wonderful story.

As for questions,

What happened to Tango? Why does his ear endermite have an eye? Would we ever be able to save him? What would a Tango redemption arc look like?

(Sorry if that's too many questions. I am INVESTED in this plot.)

I love Tango so much, I really wished for him to find some peace at the end. Tango's a mess. When he gets mad his anger just doesn't want to die down, he's gonna burn people and then feel bad he did so. The room never got to eat those strong emotions before he found the endermites and being bitten stifled his disappearance. At that point he was still not on the murderous path, he wanted to just get out and get Mumbo out too! He didn't fully get what was going on, or maybe he was in super denial about what was happening. Mumbo had his realization about it when Tango told him that no, Grian did not call for help outside, in fact he just dropped Tango into the same room, and wasn't Mumbo outside just a few days ago? How could it have been months? Mumbo refused to leave his chair while he grappled with understanding everything and Tango went off to find a solution. And he did. At some point, he managed to get out of the room. but maybe as a side effect of being turned into an endermite or maybe because of his long stay in the room itself, he couldn't stand the overworld, everything was too loud, too brigt and too overwhelming. He spawned into an unfamiliar shopping district and overwhelmed and hurt he dug a hole and hid underground. Only to fall in the newly constructed Decked out. In season 7.

Specifically, he ended up there when Tango, actual Tango was explaining decked out to Bdubs, I lost the link to the episode but i had it at some point. Our Tango, our messed up bug Tango, just.. listened to his copy speak. The whole explanation of Decked Out filled him with so much excitement, it was just the most beautiful thing! He'd missed redstone and creating and everything could be alright again- Then the game started, and every single redstone click and bell ringing made Tango's head explode with pain. He ripped out one of the bells just to shut it and escaped.

That's when it clicked into our Tango's head. He was not the real Tango anymore, was he? How could he be Tango when there was already one around and when he could barely exist in the overworld it seemed? When he couldn't do the things that used to define him. Was he just a copy? What was he? At that point he crawled back to the infinity room. It just so happened that False saw him reappear in the room, she wasn't completely lost yet, despite the room having been eating at her for a long while. She understood that Tango got out and wouldn't let him go without being let out herself.

Tango didn't want that, didn't want for her to have the same horrible experience he just had, but he wasn't able to explain that, and even if he did, she just wanted to leave. So he panicked and attacked her with his endermites, only to feel horrible immediately after. Then he hid away in some corner of the room. Only him and his mites. Then his sadness turned back to anger toward the only person he could blame for everything. Grian. There were still a few Grian's running around in the room and he took his anger out on them, not that it would fix anything but being angry and taking revenge makes him feel more real. Maybe that's what he is since he's not "Tango" anymore, he's just angry and vengeful. He tried being friends with Mumbo still, he gave him the bell he ripped out from decked out. That ended poorly. He respects the little hiding place the iskalls made from him, he wont bother them. He's so sorry for what he did to False.

[lionheartedmusings]

i will never not be endlessly fascinated with pomme and q!bad's dynamic, especially now after the egg disappearance, purgatory, and returning to the island.

because pomme's adoption wasn't this huge emotional moment or him stepping in for someone who wasn't there, their bond was built out of time and care and love, to the point that it was just the next natural step in their relationship. even after that, it took a while for pomme to call q!bad dad because she was nervous and wanted it to be at the right time -- q!bad was aware of it too, because when she did call him dad for the first time he melted, took a photo of the sign, and made it not a big deal per se but acknowledged that it was a meaningful moment between them. then they moved on and kept going as usual.

their time together is cherished and not an afterthought -- yes, when her french parents are on pomme will always do the rounds with them! of course, she wants to spend time with them! q!bad's time with her is after, and they both know that in an inherently healthy and comforting way. it's their schedule, and even if she's with q!bad and one of her other parents log on off stream she'll go to hang out and q!bad only *once* interrupted that time, and it was to ask for her opinion on footage when he thought someone was in his house.

pomme is also both a mini-bad in a lot of ways inherently, and his absolute antithesis. they both share vicious anger when those they love are endangered, are fiercely protective and paranoid, are planners and worries to a fault... i don't think pomme would be surprised to hear what her dad did in purgatory at all, even if it would make her sad. that's where they're not similar at all: pomme is vengeful too, don't get me wrong, she's an eye for an eye girlie *but* she has a level of restraint that q!bad doesn't, and a moral compass that actually sees right and wrong vs. something i care about and something i don't. q!bad has been anchored by pomme before, brought to heel so to speak, in a way that needed no convincing because there's a level of trust there that's inherent.

and yet pomme knows and q!bad has acknowledged that dapper is his priority -- not in terms of love, never that, but still a priority. and that's just okay. pomme knows she's loved, she knows her dad adores her and she also knows that she has other parents that love her whereas ultimately dapper doesn't. she knows her mom q!baghera would prioritise her, and so would q!antoine, and q!aypierre, and q!etoiles -- it's okay that q!bad doesn't because he's looking out for her brother and she loves her brother more than anything.

the one thing that's interesting to me about their dynamic is the fact that pomme is loud and proud about being q!bad's daughter and has expressed frustration that people don't know / acknowledge her as his kid, but q!bad is almost reluctant to say she's his more often than not.

i can count on one hand the times he's corrected someone when they mention only dapper, or added that pomme is his too... and yet in private to him it's always dapper and pomme. he grieved them both in their time away, left pomme a message, checked her room too. he sang her happy birthday and got her the flowers she likes. he lost it when the eggs went missing not at seeing dapper's empty bed, but pomme's. he, in the throes of his memory loss and confusion, proudly said "this has got to be pomme's, this is exactly how my daughter would organise things" about the egg rooms.

there's a duality there that is fascinating and confusing and seems... purposeful on q!bad's behalf in a way i truly can't figure out entirely.

maybe he's trying to protect her, to distance himself from her in the rest of the island's minds so if something goes wrong she can be safe in a way he knows dapper could never be -- after all, elquackity didn't take pomme, he had no idea she was his.

i guess it's all about love, anyway.

[faulty-writes]

hi! do you think you could do a iida x f!reader where they’re the daughter of sir nighteye, and when he eventually dies they go after chisaki for revenge but iida talks them out of it, and uses his experience with stain to convince them.

sorry if this is too specific, i just really like ur writing, especially the iida ones!

[ Hello dear anon. Apologies that this took longer than anticipated. I ended up having to split this into two parts. So no worries, the second part will be published as soon as I am able. But I hope you enjoy this. I like the aspect of Sir Nighteye having a daughter and her having to deal with his passing. ]

He took EVERYTHING from you and left only an empty void where your heart once resided. It felt like a violent storm drowned you in a suffocating ocean of sadness after your father, Sir Nighteye, died. But this wasn’t as bad as the suffocating worry that your friends surrounded you with.

Since Toshinori had a personal history with your father, he tried to comfort you after this unfortunate event, but you chose to isolate yourself instead. Despite your father’s passing, you knew he would be disappointed that you distanced yourself from everyone, including the man he idolized.

If you got around to cleaning the countless All Might items, he had accumulated over the years, it would be a nightmare. It was bad enough that you had to attend and deliver a eulogy at his funeral. During your speech, you choked on your words and sobbed in front of everyone until Tenya, your closest friend, politely ended it.

After that, he guided you to a private location where you cried into his chest for what seemed like hours. It’s hard to recall if you thanked him for that, but the whole event was a blur. With time, the tragic feeling of sadness gradually changed into anger as you got used to living without your father.

Wait…no that’s not quite right. Anger wasn’t the right word to describe it. The bloodthirsty need for vengeance was more accurate. Yup. You may ask, against whom? Overhaul, otherwise known as Kai Chisaki, caused your father’s demise.

And in your vengeful mindset, you laid out a plan that would, hopefully, confront him and avenge your father’s death. Once you did, you believed it would honor his memory because it would rewrite how he died in vain.

It was evident that your dark cloud of thought followed you to school the following morning, since your classmates’ raised eyebrows, and looked shocked, or just plain concerned when they saw you or passed you in the hallway.

“Ribbit, I know Y/n is still upset over what happened. But she hasn’t talked to anyone about it since,” Tsuyu said, and Eijirou nodded. “Yeah,” he replied, crossing his arms. “I’m worried about her. She’s giving off an aura scarier than Bakugou right now,” the angry blond growled.

“What the hell did you just say!?” He demanded, rising from his seat before grabbing Eijirou by the front of his uniform. Tsuyu ignored them, while Tenya tried to get their attention. “I insist you refrain from engaging in physical aggravation during class hours!” He snapped, chopping his hand through the air.

“Class hasn’t even started yet, damn four-eyes!” Katsuki snapped in response, making Tenya sigh. He believed that Katsuki was certainly rude, and it was unlikely that he’d ever gain the patience to practice proper social manners.

He pinched the bridge of his nose, trying to calm his frustration when Tsuyu spoke again. “Maybe you should talk to her Iida,” she suggested. “You’re her closest friend, right?” Her question was followed by a look of curiosity, and he returned that curious expression while clasping his chin, contemplating.

“I suppose that is correct,” he replied before looking your way. You were slumped over at your desk with your arms resting against its surface. “I am afraid that while I have been attempting to provide comfort for Y/n over the weeks since the death of her father, I have been rather unsuccessful.” He hated admitting that.

“I assumed that she required space and time so as to not further aggravate her emotional state,” he explained before taking a deep breath. “But perhaps a direct approach is needed,” he looked at Tsuyu and walked past Katsuki and Eijirou who paused and observed where he was heading.

“He’s going to talk to Y/n?” Eijirou asked, looking at Tsuyu and Katsuki huffed before dropping his hands to his sides. “Just what the hell does four-eyes think he’ll accomplish by doing that?” he questioned, crossing his arms as he continued to watch.

As Tenya approached, he noticed you mumbling to yourself. Your words, however, were indistinguishable. He stood there for a moment, curious if you noticed him. However, you seemed rather oblivious, so he cleared his throat, hoping to catch your attention.

This didn’t work. “Very well,” he stated, “pardon my reach.” He laid his hand on your shoulder and proceeded to shake you. “Hm?!” Your eyes widened, and your muttering stopped. You clenched your jaw, and turned your head, prepared to snap at whoever was disturbing your not murderous and vengeful thoughts about Chisaki.

However, you latched onto your lip when you saw who it was. “Oh,” a small wave of panic washed over you. Had he heard what you were muttering? If that was the case, you needed to play it cool or dumb. However, it wasn’t easy to fool Tenya, especially since his incident with Mei at the Sports Festival.

You glanced away while rubbing your neck. Here goes nothing. “Oh hey, Iida,” you replied, ignoring how your stomach churned and twisted into knots. As a hero student, you hated feeling nervous, although, given the negative emotions you had been experiencing lately, this feeling was more than welcome.

You frowned and focused on Tenya again. It was scary, in a way, to think that he probably knew more about how you felt than anyone else. Yes, you pushed everyone who attempted to comfort you away and although your actions were justified due to the recent tragedy that occurred, Tenya was persistent.

It was a wonder what he’d think if you told him that the tiny voice of reason in your head seemed to vanish whenever your thoughts switched to Chisaki, and hatred engulfed your heart. He narrowed his eyes, gazing at you with concern.

“Are you…well?” He asked. “Well?” You repeated, your eyes glossing over and your gaze turning toward the front of the classroom. “Yes…I am well,” you replied, but your voice lacked emotion, and that alarmed him even more.

He had been rather concerned about your well-being and state of mind after your father’s death. When Tensei was greatly injured, he experienced such emotional turmoil that he almost lost his sense of heroism and logic.

He would hate to see you go down the same path, even though you claimed to be fine. Yet, when you turned to look at him, he noticed something in your eyes, and it made his stomach turn. He swallowed heavily but decided to address it later.

“I see,” he took a step back and pressed a hand against his chest. “Are you…certain you are feeling well?” He questioned, his eyes narrowing with suspicion. He did not want to believe that you would lie to him. However, he also knew there was a chance that you didn’t even know how you were feeling now.

Emotions were quite hard to explain at times and traumatic events tended to cause one to feel “numb” and as such, a lack of emotion followed, and made it difficult for one to truly grasp just how they felt. He supposed you were also going through the various stages of grief, which too was understandable.

Your whole life changed overnight, and yet the world continued to turn. Forcing you to abide by its rules when all you desired was a break, a mere moment to recollect yourself. Yet, this did not happen. He knew how frustrating that was.

Perhaps that is why his words were of no use to you now and he was better suited to continue to play the role of support. That was quite efficient in most cases because it allowed the individual the space they so required while at the same time, knowing that there was someone there to reach out to when needed.

“Yes,” you replied. Once again, your voice was barely audible. It was almost as though someone was pulling a string and speaking for you. A single recorded phrase that meant nothing and although he did not like it, he had to accept it. At least for the moment.

He nodded. “Very well, I am certain you already know that I will always be present if you require any assistance or perhaps…someone to lend an ear and discuss the ailments you are experiencing,” he stated, chopping his hand rhythmically through the air.

“Yes,” you replied, staring blankly at the front of the classroom again. He curled his lips and shook his head in uncertainty. Nevertheless, he turned around and walked back to Tsuyu and Eijirou, who were now joined by Shoto and Izuku.

“H-hey Iida,” Izuku greeted cheerfully. “Hello,” he replied, grasping his chin, and tapping it with his finger. Tenya ignored how they exchanged glances and the silence that filled the air was broken when Eijirou snapped, “Well!?” Izuku was startled by his outburst while Shoto raised his eyebrow.

Tenya glanced at him. “What happened with Y/n!? Is she okay?!” He urged, and Shoto turned to Izuku. “Y/n?” he questioned, and Izuku shrugged, uncertain of the conversation taking place. Tsuyu walked over and laid her hand on Eijirou’s back, making him recoil before looking at her from over his shoulder.

“Oh heh, sorry,” he replied. He got emotional and sometimes let it go to his head. “We’re all concerned about Y/n,” she explained, glancing at Izuku and Shoto. “It’s going to be a while before she’s okay again. I know she must miss Sir Nighteye.” All of them did.

“Ribbit, but I’ve noticed something off-putting about Y/n lately too,” something that wasn’t sadness nor anger, but an entirely different emotion she couldn’t quite put her finger on. “Hm,” she tapped her lips before looking at Tenya.

“Actually…” she said. Maybe she could describe the emotion she saw in you after all. “The way she’s acting reminds me of Iida,” she commented. “Pardon?” Tenya replied, perhaps the most confused among his friends. “Don’t you remember, Iida?” she asked. “After your brother was injured,” she clarified.  

Izuku frowned. “Y-yeah, I remember that T-Todoroki-kun and I w-went after you,” or rather it was a matter of lucky circumstance that they happened to be in the same area as Tenya at the time. “We…defeated The H-Hero Killer together…” he continued, “and a-after…Iida admitted that…” His hands curled into fists.

He had a hard time remembering the emotional impact of that day. Shoto, noticing his friend’s distressed state, placed a hand on his shoulder. He wasn’t much for physical affection, but since making friends at Yuuei, he learned how to provide comfort.

Izuku turned to him, but Shoto’s eyes shifted to Tenya. “Iida went after Stain like a fool,” he said, never one to sugarcoat anything. Although he seemed unaware of the awkward tension he had created. “You let your anger cloud your judgment…I let it cloud my judgment too,” he admitted.

Thinking back to how he used to be, so angry and closed off to the world. He was truly thankful to his friends for helping him escape his shell. Eijirou’s jaw dropped, and his eyes widened as if he had seen the most horrific sight. “Wait…” He paused, making sure he understood everything.

“Are you suggesting that Y/n might…” he shuttered to think about it, but nobody expected someone as rational as Tenya to do what he did either. All eyes turned to him, and quite frankly, he was at a loss for words. “Well, I…” he straightened his posture and pushed his glasses up, looking in your direction perplexed.

“I am not certain…” although given your insistence that you were fine, you may still be in denial about what happened or hiding your true emotions just as he did. “Talking to her hadn’t helped provide you with a clue?” Shoto asked, now making everyone look at him.

Eijirou chuckled and laid his hand on Shoto’s shoulder. This made him tremble in response and look at the redhead as if he insulted his ancestry. “I think you’re being too blunt,” he stated, making Shoto knit his eyebrows. “Blunt?” He repeated but Tsuyu spoke up. “Todoroki-kun makes a good point,” she said.

“Then again, nobody knew what Iida wanted to do until it was too late,” she tapped her chin a few times, letting her eyes linger on you. “Maybe we need to observe her,” she suggested, making Eijirou raise his eyebrow. “Observe her? What do you mean, like keep an eye on her?” she nodded.

“What do you think Iida?” She asked, noticing he was frowning. “I am not certain that is the best strategy as it may invade the barriers of privacy,” he stated, chopping his hand lightly through the air. “However, perhaps that is the only option we have left…” he concluded.

“S-so how can w-we do it?” Izuku peeped up. Eijirou grinned. “Yeah! We have to be stealthy, right?” He asked, turning to Shoto who wore a blank expression as he thought. “I don’t think we need to spy,” he said a minute later. “Just keep an eye on her like Tsuyu suggested,” he noted.

“It doesn’t mean we need to watch her all the time. We just need to make sure she doesn’t hurt herself or wander somewhere alone,” he clarified. “Oh, okay,” Eijirou said. “So, give her space but talk to her when we think she’s doing something suspicious?” In a way, it still seemed dishonest.

“Perhaps that is best,” Tenya said, but in the back of his mind he couldn’t help but wonder if, like him, there was a chance you’d wander off when you suspected no one was watching you. Regardless, it was his job along with your mutual friends to prevent you from walking down a dark path from which there was no return.

“All right, everyone in your seats,” Shota stated as he walked through the door. “Yes sir!” Tenya immediately said, scrambling to get to his seat just as his friends did. While he normally paid attention in class, he found his gaze drifting to you.

You looked intensely focused on your thoughts instead of the lesson Mr. Aizawa was currently teaching. He might be pleased to know he was right. Within your mind, you devised several plans to confront Chisaki. These were the ideas you scribbled down in your notebook.

You assumed that nobody would look at it especially given your unique situation. Yuuei insisted you have sessions with the lifestyle guidance counselor, Ryo Inui also known as the Hunting Dog Hero: Hound Dog. Usually, these sessions are one hour long on selected days of the week. Today was one of those days.

As to not disturb your afternoon hero training too much, the sessions took place during lunch. Ryo usually kept quiet, to your surprise, during the first 25 minutes of the session to give you time to eat. The remaining time was used to talk about how you were feeling, and how you were dealing with the loss of your father.

But you told him what you told everyone else: that you were fine. Of course, he didn’t buy that. “One day you’ll have to face how you feel!” He growled at you. Oh, if only he knew what you were about to do. “If you can’t handle that, come to us!” You hated it when he gave this speech, even if he had a valid point to make.

“You rely on us heroes to protect you even from yourselves!” You knew he meant well but letting someone else handle your demons just seemed wrong. Although that could be your stubborn and determined attitude speaking. Your father taught you how to be cold and calculated in a sense, and to do nothing short of your best.

Yet maybe that played into your naive plan regarding what you wished to do to Chisaki. Nevertheless, the session ended without you learning or improving. Your rushed footsteps echoed down the hallway as you exited your classroom and headed to Gym Gamma.

You had some regret not taking your hero costume with you to your session with Ryo, but it didn’t matter now. You carried it with one hand while your other was wrapped around the strap of your backpack which hung off your shoulder. As you turned the hallway corner, you stumbled back and fell to the floor with a thud.

The suitcase containing your hero costume flew and bounced on the floor a few times. It then hit the opposite wall near an empty classroom. Your backpack contents spilled out, littering the floor. You sat up, hissing softly.

“Ouch…” you muttered before someone stepped in front of you. “Apologies,” when you looked up, Tenya stared back at you. He was dressed in his hero suit, apart from the helmet that normally concealed his face.

“Hm?” When he realized he had run into you, he leaned onto one knee and glanced at you from head to toe. “Are you injured? Forgive me, I was not anticipating someone coming around the corner at the accelerated speed you were going,” he explained.

“Yeah well…” You glanced away, irritated. “I’m not injured…” you muttered. “Then may I assist you in gathering your things?” He asked, referring to the contents of your backpack. You sighed and slowly sat on your knees.

“Yeah, I guess,” you replied, picking up the first few items within reach. Tenya walked around and picked up one of the textbooks. He handed it to you before grabbing the notebook you were writing in earlier that morning.

After placing the textbook in your backpack, you grabbed said notebook. However, it slipped between your fingers when Tenya handed it to you and landed on the floor again. Your vengeful ideas were scribbled across its pages and were now laid open for the world to see.

You cursed yourself for hesitating because that allowed Tenya to pick up the notebook and curiously look at what you had written down. Your heart pounded and you could only helplessly watch his eyebrows knit together.

“Pardon but-” You jumped to your feet and snatched it from him. He looked shocked by your behavior. “W-what are you even doing here!?” You demanded, clenching the notebook to your chest, and glaring at him. He blinked a few times, and you noticed a suspicious look in his eye.

“I…was merely assisting an injured classmate to Recovery Girl,” he replied. You huffed “Good for you,” in response before frantically picking up the rest of your things. You shoved them into your backpack and grabbed the metal suitcase containing your hero suit.

“Y/n?” Tenya asked, watching the spectacle with serious concern. However, he remained silent as you raced down the hallway. This was despite his urge to exclaim that running in hallways was prohibited. Little did he know your cheeks burned red.

‘Stupid, stupid, stupid!’ Out of all the things he could have seen. Well, maybe you could just…make some excuse if he asked about them. Something along the lines of getting your emotions out on paper. Yeah, that sounded fine. Writing was a form of coping, right?

Although you weren’t certain how much of that Tenya would buy, the way he looked at you the rest of the day only indicated that his suspicions were high. You tried to ignore it to the best of your ability and avoided him when you could.

You knew that might come back to bite you, but you didn’t care because there were more important things to do. Like conducting research regarding Chisaki’s whereabouts. Luckily, it was easy to fool Principal Nezu and the rest of your teachers.

Simply, you told them that you needed time for yourself and felt overwhelmed by your emotions. You couldn’t be disturbed while doing research. Although you felt some remorse for using your father’s death as an excuse to do your vengeful research, it would be worth it.

They granted you a week off without consequence. The only condition was that you had to stay within Yuuei student housing grounds and continue your regularly scheduled sessions with Hound Dog. A small price to pay, not that you were going anywhere, not yet at least.

Although the student dorm was a bit eerie during the day because of the dead silence with the occasional creaks and cracks of the building settling, you tried not to let this disturb you as you started your week-long research. Of course, your friends were concerned when they noticed you were absent from class.

In addition, you rarely left your room during the evening. However, none were more concerned than Tenya. Frankly, he couldn’t help but think back to the strange writing you had in your notebook. It wasn’t that hard to figure out that those writings and your current behavior were connected.

“A-are you sure about this I-Iida?” Izuku asked. “Yeah, I mean she could just be trying to express herself. Nothing’s more manly than taking control of your emotions!” Eijirou declared with a smile while Tsuyu thought quietly.

“I’m most certain the writing within her notebook was not merely a method to cope with her emotions,” he replied sternly. “Are you sure?” Eijirou asked before Tsuyu spoke up. “Ribbit, well if Iida is right then Y/n needs our help,” she concluded.

“Well, if there’s something wrong and she’s going to go through with what she wrote, I agree,” Eijirou said. Izuku clenched his jaw, his features twisted with uncertainty. “B-but we…we can’t just f-force help onto h-her…” he stated before glancing away, trying to devise a reasonable solution in his head.

“W-what if they try to…l-leave? They haven’t even b-been in class lately a-and…” he frowned. He hated thinking you would do something sneaky like him, Shoto, Tenya, Eijirou, and Momo had when The League kidnapped Katsuki.

Leaving in the middle of the night without telling anyone and running around the city in disguises wasn’t the nicest or smartest thing they could have done. Not to mention how they neglected Tsuyu’s feelings on the matter. However, at least they patched things up and Eijirou and her were closer than ever.

All eyes seemed to linger on the ground. More than likely, they were all thinking the same thing Izuku was. “Maybe…we can ask Yaoyorozu for help?” Tsuyu suggested, naturally catching everyone’s attention. “May I ask you to elaborate on your suggestion?” Tenya replied, and Eijirou nodded.

“Yeah, why ask Yaoyorozu for help?” he asked. “I’m sure she can figure out a way to keep track of Y/n without us interfering,” she explained. “Huh…” Eijirou thought about her words, glancing at Izuku who seemed concerned about the idea of asking Momo for help while Tenya sighed.

“Perhaps it would be beneficial to use alternative methods to ensure we don’t worsen Y/n’s already fragile condition,” he said before looking at Tsuyu. “Do you believe Momo could provide such a solution?” Tsuyu smiled, the tip of her tongue sticking out from between her lips.

She nodded in response to Tenya’s question and with some hesitance, the four of them sought her out. “I’m honored that you’d ask for my help,” Yaoyorozu said, placing a hand on her chest. “But I don’t know what I can do,” she said, tapping her lips a few times.

“Y/n is entitled to a little privacy and time alone to sort out her feelings. I can’t imagine what she’s going through,” she said with a frown. “That’s exactly why we need your help!” Eijirou exclaimed, curling his hands into fists.

Yaoyorozu looked at him, her eyebrow raised. “Come on, there must be something you can do,” he said while Tsuyu laid a comforting hand on his back. “Iida is mostly concerned about what he found in Y/n’s notebook,” she explained. “Her notebook?” She asked, looking at Tenya perplexed.

“I’m not certain if the writings found in her notebook were a coping mechanism that assisted her in organizing her complex array of emotions or perhaps…plans she wishes to enact,” he explained. Silence lingered in the air shortly after. Eijirou looked at Izuku before walking toward Yaoyorozu.

“Whatever it is, Iida is right to be concerned. We all are!” He stated, determination shining in his eyes before grabbing Yaoyorozu’s hands. She looked shocked by this action, almost as if it were foreign. He leaned forward, locking eyes with her.

“He’s doing the right thing by bringing this to our attention. Even if Y/n doesn’t want our help, we need to prevent her from making a big mistake,” he said, tightening his grip on her hands. “So please,” he brought her hands against his chest where his heart pounded erratically.

“Will you help us?” He asked. “Mm…” she glanced away, thinking for a moment. “Alright,” she said, standing up. “I think I have a solution,” extending her arm, it glowed a faint blue hue before several oval-shaped devices fell onto the floor, each one clinking as they piled on top of one another.

“Huh?” Eijirou looked at the devices, clearly confused about what they were while Tenya picked one up, examining it closely. “These are motion devices,” Yaoyorozu explained before a larger, more rectangular device manifested from her arm. She quickly grasped it before it hit the floor.

“Here,” she said, holding it out to Tenya. He looked perplexed but took it, nonetheless. She smiled proudly and placed a hand on her hip. “That will alert you when the motion sensors are set off, but it may be impossible to tell what sets them off,” she explained.

“Still, I know it will help with your request,” Tenya enclosed his hand around the device. “Thank you very much for your assistance. I am most certain this will help indeed,” he replied, smiling at Yaoyorozu. She returned it and looked at Eijirou, Tsuyu, and Izuku.

“I believe we should find appropriate locations for these motion devices,” Tenya said, kneeling to gather them in his hand. “R-right!” Izuku replied, helping him pick them up while Eijirou laid his hand on Yaoyorozu’s shoulder.

“Yeah, thanks! We owe you one!” He grinned like a madman showing off his pointy-shark-like teeth and while that may unsettle some, she nodded. “Glad I could help,” she said, “especially if Y/n needs it.” A frown came to her face. “I hope they’re alright.” It was evident she was just as worried as everyone else.

Following this, Tenya carefully considered the proper locations for the motion devices. He believed the most beneficial locations were the front steps of the Class A dormitory, the entrance to the nearby forest, and along the road to Yuuei High. Yes, these particular spots would also be triggered throughout the day.

However, there was more likelihood that, if by chance you would leave, you’d do it at night. The days following were some of Tenya’s most emotionally heightened. He was constantly on edge, waiting for something to happen.

When night came, he always woke up to the sound of the motion devices going off. However, every time he hurried outside, he found that something else triggered it. Like an animal curiously passing by in the dead of night.

While his friends lost hope or doubted that the writings Tenya described in your notebook were malicious, something told him that was not the case. Perhaps one could call it intuition, but he could not accept that those writings were merely emotional expressions.

He believed they were motives. Plans you wished to take into action, and he would not rest until he caught you in the act or prevented you from doing it. So, he continued to wait, and the following night, he was jolted out of his sleep when the device went off as it had done many times before.

He hitched his breath, immediately grabbing his glasses. Despite being in his sleepwear, he slipped on a light jacket, put on his jogging shoes, and left his sleeping cap on his bed. The last thing he grabbed was the device that had jolted him awake and went to your room.

He noticed that your door was left ajar. “Mm…” Despite respecting the inner sanctum of another’s living space, he placed his hand on the doorframe and peered into your room. Even with the lights shut off, he noticed that your bed was undone, and you were nowhere to be found.

He also noticed that the dresser drawers were open, almost as if you rushed to gather clothing before disappearing. His grip tightened on the doorframe, his nails digging into it briefly before he ran down the hallway. He knew his frantic steps might alert his classmates and wake them from their sleep.

However, he did not care, there was a more pressing matter at hand. This was, of course, finding you and possibly stopping whatever horrific act you wished to commit. He had to find you before it was too late. He had to save you.

He pushed past the front door of the student dorm and hurried down the stairs as the cool night air evaporated his breath. He looked back and forth along the road that surrounded the student campus, and his heart sank when he realized you were nowhere in sight.

Silence fell over him, accompanied by the cries of owls and the chirping of insects in the distance. Then he extended one leg out in front of him, bending it at the knee and extending the opposite leg behind him. His calves shifted and six small engines appeared that sparked to life with a loud rumble.

A deafening silence fell over the world around him as his eyes focused forward. He was about to take off to search the surrounding areas where he had placed the motion devices as he had done countless times before. The only difference was that he was certain you had left the premises this time.

While it could have been easy enough to assume you had merely woken up in the middle of the night to have a snack or use the restroom, it appeared you had taken provisions. This was enough to convince him you were out here.

His engines backfired temporarily when a hand grabbed his shoulder, surprising him and breaking his concentration. “Wow, heh, sorry Iida,” Eijirou said, flashing him a smile. “We were wondering if you’d be out here,” Tsuyu chimed in, coming to stand next to Eijirou. Tenya knit his eyebrows.

“Well, heh,” Eijirou rubbed the back of his head, “you kind of woke everyone up with your rushed footsteps…and Izuku wanted to know what happened,” he explained, nervously. Tsuyu nodded. “When he noticed you weren’t in your room, he searched the dorm, ribbit.”

She then shrugged. “I figured you’d gone after Y/n or something else that triggered the motion sensors,” she explained, pressing one finger to her chin. “Yeah, but we didn’t want you to search alone anymore or go after Y/n by yourself, considering how determined you can get sometimes,” Eijirou said before looking around.

“I was just preparing to track her down,” Tenya explained, almost sounding irritated that he had been interrupted despite knowing his friends meant well. “We’ll help then!” He declared and ignored Tenya’s raised eyebrow.

“I am not certain that is the most beneficial-” Eijirou grabbed onto his shoulders, shaking him. “Which way do you want us to go?!” He asked frantically, and yet again Tenya looked at him with a raised eyebrow before a sigh passed his lips. He felt annoyed but knew that, perhaps, the more help he got the better.

Then again, this was a delicate situation and if more than one person approached you, there was a chance you’d become hostile. That is why he needed to ensure that he found you first. But regardless, he nodded. “Very well,” he said, clasping his chin in thought.

“Perhaps Tsuyu can provide assistance in searching behind the campus. I will search the area up ahead,” he stated, motioning with his hand. “Right, I’ll go this way!” Eijirou exclaimed before running in the opposite direction. In Tenya’s mind, he wondered if they’d get in trouble.

The teachers keep a close eye on the student housing, but surely, they’d understand this situation if Tenya explained it to them. “Good luck on your search Iida,” Tsuyu said before hopping off the ground at a great distance. He watched her soar through the air and turned to see Eijirou looking back and forth a long way down the path.

He trusted that they would do the right thing if they happened upon you but now wasn’t the time to sit and contemplate that. Once again, he got into position, and without delay he was gone in a flash, leaving nothing but lingering gray smoke behind.

The world blurred around him as he sped by, yet it all seemed to be happening in slow motion. The piercing wind against his body felt like a thousand tiny cuts across his exposed flesh, but he didn’t care. Like a true hero, the only thing he focused on in this moment was you.

Near the wooded area, opposite the student dormitory, he slowed his pace and leaned over. Placing his hands on his knees, he panted softly and wiped the sweat from his face. His chest felt heavy, and perhaps that was the weight of responsibility he felt.

He needed to find you, but how? There were endless possibilities as to which direction and path you had taken. Even with his friends searching the area, what was the likelihood that they’d find you before the sun rose? His soft panting continued, and the cool air around him made his moistened skin sting.

The feeling of doubt was beginning to linger in the back of his mind when he felt something vibrate in his pocket. “Hm,” he paused and leaned up before pulling out the device. He looked at it perplexed as it continued to vibrate in his hand.

He pondered for a moment if this was merely another false alarm and that an animal had triggered one of the many motion sensors that were scattered about the area. However, as he lifted his head and glanced into the distance, he noted the trees that made up the nearby forest.

He couldn’t recall at this moment if he had placed a motion sensor in the location he was currently in, but perhaps this was a sign. He swallowed thickly and placed the device back into his pocket before his engines reeved again and he took off for the forest.

The ground underneath him seemed to change in density, its surface turning thicker and more slippery. Perhaps that was due to the mud that accumulated in the area, and he had to slow his pace the closer he got to the entrance of the forest to not slip and fall. He would despise being covered in mud.

Taking a deep breath, he ignored the pounding of his heart in his chest as he cautiously walked up to the first set of trees and noticed a small square device resting against the base of one of the said trees. When he got closer, the device in his pocket vibrated once more.

“Hm,” he clasped his chin and looked at the ground. Although it was dark, the moon allowed him just enough light to be able to make out footprints that led into the forest. “Mm,” he frowned and slowly kneeled to examine them closer.

It was impossible to tell if these were your footprints or perhaps someone else’s, but either way time was ticking away, and seconds were precious now. It was evident that there was a chance you had deviated from the path and instead, took refuge in the forest.

If that were true, then not only were you in danger of getting lost but potential animals could cause harm to you as well. Regardless, if there was a sliver of a chance that you had attempted to hide yourself in the greenery, he needed to take it.

With that in mind, he headed to the forest. He cautiously glanced around and despite the darkened sky looming above him, the small amount of light provided by the moon helped outline the trees and the path that nestled between them.

[ Part II ]

[deadboy-edwin]

Believing the god of Fear (Charles Rowland x Edwin Payne)

2.3k words

Neither Edwin nor Charles had expected to meet a Greek god in any of their cases. Especially not in such a simple one, which had started out as a simple request to exorcise a little girl. However, Edwin supposed that it was quite apt that the god they’d encounter would be the god of fear. Quite on the nose, really. “All I ask is to see your worst fear. That should be sufficient for me to break through this curse.”

I am lowkey nervous about posting to a new fandom, but I have been informed by @a-bisexual-panicking that rule 1 of this fandom is people always want Payneland fics... So. Hi. Please be nice to me lmao.

This fic is also available on AO3, if anyone wants to check that out!

Neither Edwin nor Charles had expected to meet a Greek god in any of their cases. Especially not in such a simple one, which had started out as a simple request to exorcise a little girl. 

However, Edwin supposed that it was quite apt that the god they’d encounter would be the god of fear. Quite on the nose, really. 

The god himself, Phobos, is far from what the legends had made him out to be. From his research, Edwin had expected a wrath-filled, vengeful, giant to stand before them once they’d finally found Phobos. Instead, the being they encounter is far from anything either of the boys would have ever expected.

First of all, the books had said that Phobos was a man. 

The being that stands before them, however, is a pale-skinned girl, not older than 7 years of age, with dark, flowing hair, and pitch black eyes. 

“I presume, you have come for the girl,” Phobos says in greeting, soft voice underlied with a vibration of power, despite the less than intimidating physical form. “You have arrived just in time, Charles Rowland and Edwin Payne.” 

Edwin tilts his head questioningly at the lack of hostility in the god’s tone. “Should I dare to hope that you would just let her go?” 

A laugh. 

“If only it could be so easy,” the deity says in the child’s high voice. Black eyes look upwards towards the duo. “If I could depart from this vessel, I would. Yet I am cursed to live as a mortal.”

“What the fuck does that mean?” Charles snaps from beside Edwin, crossing his arms. “You’re a god. Do you even need to possess a living human?”

“This is not a possession. I am not a ghost.” Phobos says with a scowl, which admittedly looks adorable on the little girl’s face. “A powerful witch bound my essence to Marie. One of the last believers in the old gods.”

“But- you’re a god? Can’t you just- can a witch even overpower a god?” 

“That doesn’t mean as much as it once did, young man.” Phobos says wearily. “Eons ago, we were worshipped. Adored. Sustained by the godliness the humans had bestowed on us. Yet in this modern age, as believers dwindle in number, I am reduced to a shadow of my former glory. Do I look like I enjoy being a little girl?”

Charles snorts at the last bit of Phobos’ statement. Edwin elbows him, shooting his best mate a sharp look. “Charles meant no offense, of course. You will have to forgive him.” 

“No harm done, since I, too, find this situation absolutely ridiculous.” Phobos says airily, waving off Charles’ disrespect, nonplussed. “I wish to move on. To where gods lay rest. Unfortunately, I don’t have such luxuries. The curse entails having to live Marie’s mortal life, and die Marie’s mortal death. She is my descendant, which I suppose is how it was so easy to bind me to her.” 

A god should be able to unravel a curse quite easily, Edwin thinks to himself.. 

“I’m a dying god, Edwin Payne. I need power to break this curse.” 

“And how, precisely, would you get power?” Edwin queries, raising one perfectly shaped eyebrow at their adversary, apparently turned client. Turns out, the case of Phobos was more similar to all of their other cases- one who wanted to pass on. 

The sad look that Phobos gives the two boys is an answer of its own. Edwin already knows the answer, even before the deity speaks once more. 

“I am the god of fear and panic, am I not?”

When Edwin and Phobos come to an agreement on a course of action, it is simple. 

Too simple. 

Feed the god with fear. 

“One will be enough,” Phobos states with finality, nodding to himself. “All I ask is to see your worst fear. That should be sufficient for me to break through this curse.”

Edwin is the first to offer his outstretched hand to the figure in front of them. It’s an odd shift from the duo’s usual dynamic. Charles is typically the one who is quick to defend, brandishing his bat against whatever threat stands before them, the Victorian boy trusting enough in his companion to not even twitch a muscle in the face of whatever horrors they confront. 

Yet in this instance, Edwin is the first to move. 

Edwin has no fear he has yet to face- he's been through the depths of hell. He's lived (pun not intended) through horrors most could not even imagine. There's nothing that Phobos could show him that Edwin hadn't already been through---

"Oh fuck no," Charles' words are almost vicious, his hand coming to circle around Edwin's wrist, fingers tightening around pale skin and a long sleeve. "No." 

"Don't be ridiculous, Charles." Edwin says in his typical matter-of-fact tone, unbothered as ever. "I will be fine. As Phobos said, it would all be in my mind. This was my idea, after all. So, would you be so kind as to release me?" 

Charles shakes his head, his eyes wild, almost manic, as he looks at his best mate. "You've been through hell twice. I promised myself you'd never return there. Not even in your mind." 

Edwin opens his mouth to speak, to contradict Charles' point, but Charles is quick to hold out his open palm to Phobos, glaring at the god vehemently. "Get on with it, then."

"As you wish," Phobos says, taking Charles' hand in his own, before Edwin is able to protest. 

“Why would you do that, Charles? You cannot just do things based on what you feel in the moment. I told you I would be perfectly fine.” 

Charles’ mouth opens and closes silently, as if he is doing his best impression of a goldfish. 

The younger ghost’s instinct would always be to protect Edwin, first and foremost. It’s easier than breathing had been, thirty years ago. Charles doesn’t even understand why Edwin is asking him this question. 

“You protect me, I protect you. That’s you and me, mate.” 

Charles doesn’t know where his answer comes from. As the words leave his lips, though, he knows that they are true. 

Edwin’s stoic expression melts into something Charles can’t interpret. He steps forward, closer to Charles, green eyes intensely surveying every single inch of Charles’ face with a searching look.

“I’m fine, Edwin. It was nothing, really.” It’s true. Charles can’t even recall the terror he had supposedly faced in order to allow Phobos to be free of the curse. “I don’t even remember it. Perhaps he took it away?” 

“Perhaps,” Edwin says thoughtfully, his lips turning downwards thoughtfully, though there is still doubt in his tone. “Are you sure you’re alright, Charles? You can talk to me about anything, you know that right?” 

“I know, mate.” Charles says, his trademark grin crossing his features. He isn’t even lying. Job successfully jobbed, and the worst part hadn’t even been that bad. “I mean it though, I don’t even remember it. Lay off, will you? You love me too much.”

The last few words leave Charles’ lips without thought- and once his brain catches up to his mouth, he bites his tongue. Had it been too soon? Hell hadn’t been too long ago, and Charles knew they had yet to discuss Edwin’s confession. He opens his mouth to- apologize? To try and joke around? He doesn’t even know at this point- 

Edwin saves Charles from having to stumble around his thoughtless comment by stepping closer to the other boy, a hand placed on the shoulder of Charles’ coat, in what Charles thinks is comfort, or reassurance. Reassurance that he hadn’t gone too far, that he hadn’t mucked things up between them irreversibly, or even temporarily with his comment. 

“Oh Charles,” Edwin’s silky, soft voice says gently, his pale, slender hand coming to brush against Charles’ face. “How could you ever think I was in love with you?” 

Charles should be relieved. This should be a weight off his shoulders. Sure, he’d told Edwin that they had forever to figure out what his confession had meant. He had meant it- truly, from the depths of his dead, unbeating heart, despite not knowing where to even begin with all of it. He had been willing to. Despite Crystal, despite his own unhealed trauma- he knew that he would do anything and anything for Edwin. 

Instead, Edwin’s words burn ice cold. Terror flows through Charles’ frozen veins, sheer chaos swirling in his mind. This is worse than hell, worse than Death herself coming to take his soul—

“I- what- mate-” 

Edwin’s thin lips take on a smile that should be familiar, comforting, but instead, his porcelain features are twisted in a mockery of the softness typically reserved for Charles, and Charles alone. 

He leans in closer to Charles, their noses almost brushing. 

For the first time in thirty years, Charles feels his breath catch in his throat. 

Despite seeing Edwin every single day, almost never being apart for the totality of thirty years, Charles finds himself caught off guard by the realization that Edwin is the most beautiful thing he has ever seen in his life (and afterlife).

Even if Edwin is being unspeakably cruel.

Especially then, it seems. 

Charles doesn’t have a spare second to process what these thoughts mean, because he can almost feel Edwin’s breath on his skin, the slight shift in the ear when he blinks, long lashes sending miniscule motions in the air, so insignificant yet so palpable. 

“Always the slow one,” Edwin croons, green eyes glimmering, his face still painfully close to Charles’ own. “Sweet, stupid, Charles. Why would I want you? So impulsive, so angry. Almost as if-” 

Edwin cuts himself off with a vicious grin. It’s almost evil. 

“Almost as if you can’t be loved. Or love at all.” 

A meow that almost sounds like a laugh, coming from somewhere in the periphery, is the last that Charles hears. 

Charles is gasping for oxygen his incorporeal body doesn’t need. He doesn’t even realize it, but he’s fallen to the ground, eyes rabid, hands clutching his own face as a silent scream escapes his lips. 

Before him, is Marie. 

The dark eyes staring out of the young girl’s body are filled with pity as they look at Charles. A small hand comes to stroke Charles’ back in silent comfort as he breaks down.

The scene stays that way for several minutes, tears escaping from Charles’ eyes at some point. He can’t even figure out at which point he’d started crying. Silent screams and choked gasps dissolve into sobs.

“Fuck,” Charles gasps out, sniffling, his hands coming to angrily wipe his tears from his eyes. “What the fuck, I-” 

“For what it is worth, I am sorry, Charles Rowland.” Phobos says, true sadness accompanying the soft, high voice he spoke through. “Thank you.” 

The words of gratitude bring about white-hot emotion in the broken boy. “I didn’t do this for you.” 

“I know. Do you know why you did it though?” 

A question so similar to what Edwin- or, not Edwin, had asked in Charles’ mind. The answer is the same- that such a question doesn’t even need asking. Even now, as he heaves and sighs in exhaustion, he knows that he would suffer through anything and everything for Edwin Payne. There is no rhyme or reason to it- it’s just the way things are. There is no why. 

Charles remains silent, wiping his face angrily with the sleeve of his coat, trying to regain even the slightest semblance of composure. 

“It is interesting how my domain interacts with mortals,” the god says thoughtfully, voice gentle. “Your terror. It is pure. It shows you what matters most, doesn’t it?”

Charles jerks back to reality when he feels his hand drop into thin air. 

Marie falls gently to the floor, almost as if an invisible force is setting her down with the utmost care. Her eyes are closed, slumbering peacefully. 

There is a certain softness to the child that had not been there previously, as compared to mere moments ago. Even unconscious, innocence that had not been present before seems to radiate from her. 

It makes Charles smile, albeit the turmoil he feels inside at what he’d just experienced.

He turns to look around, to search for any sign of Phobos, but instead he is met with the sight of green eyes. 

Charles feels like he’s looking at a trainwreck. He just wants to look away, to avoid any tiny reminder of the cruelty he’d last seen in those irises, but he can’t tear his gaze from the beautiful aquamarine. 

Perhaps, this is what being in love meant, Charles finds himself thinking. Just wanting every bit of Edwin he could get, even if it was as small as his eyes being focused on Charles.

Emerald green swirl with concern as they fix on Charles. So, so different from the vicious green that had torn his very essence to shreds barely a few moments ago. 

As Edwin fusses over Charles, who is still lost in a daze, pale hands, coming to cup his face so similarly to what he’d just faced, but so different, he swears he hears another voice above Edwin’s “Charles, you went to hell for me- you should’ve let me do this for you”s, and “Please say something”s. 

“Even the worst of fears, if one is fortunate enough, are completely unfounded. Sometimes, fear is just that. Fear.” 

It is a non-voice that speaks those words, with an invisible force brushing against Charles’ cheek almost sweetly. The words snap Charles back to reality.

If the god of fear himself had said it, Charles supposed that it must be true.

He allows himself to relax into Edwin’s touch, grasping at Edwin’s sleeves desperately, needing more- but that was okay. 

As Charles himself had once said, at the stairs of hell, so long ago yet so recently, they had forever.

As always, comments, reblogs and likes are much appreciated!

My fics are my own- please do not post them on other platforms without my explicit permission.

[midnight-in-town]

A hypothetical question about kuroshitsuji. Hope u don't mind. Well, I read a certain anon's wonderful long post about Tanaka. And there was that one question that really intrigued me.

What if the person you are supposed to be taking revenge on is dead or doesn't exist anymore?

Now, I know that you think that the culprit was a supernatural being or a demon. But, what if, it wasn't? Do you by any chance give me a hypothetical answer to that? Do you happen to know that where could the story go if that was the case? Just your opinion.

Hey Anon! So about what I said here, while I believe our!Ciel's main target of revenge is indeed alive and includes a supernatural being (aka the Queen and JB), the circumstances behind Ciel's revenge may actually be mostly about dead people (that aren't even bizarre dolls).

First of all, Kuroshitsuji as a series really emphasizes that being unable to move on is a flaw that hinders growth. That's why revenge is thematically presented, in my opinion, as the wrong choice to make / the choice to make for wrong reasons [x][x].

The Bizarre Dolls project being such a big part of the plot also is there to make us understand that focusing on the past rather than present and future is destructive (the Under-"hello darkness my old friend"-taker himself).

Keeping that in mind, I believe Victoria is the big bad yes, so she gave the order to get rid of Vincent and John Brown, as her bound demon, orchestrated a gruesome massacre using real!Ciel (the RCMT). Yet the reasons why she ordered it are still shrouded in mystery.

I actually proposed not so long ago that Vincent had become a political enemy of Victoria and that it was probably related to that. However, Vincent isn't the only Watchdog Victoria probably murdered. Indeed, before Vincent there was Claudia and a few hints in the story imply that she too had a rather sad end.

So, was Claudia a political enemy of Victoria too ? We don't know at all, but I think it's more likely that Claudia's death was more personal and could be related one way or another to Prince Albert's death.

All that to say maybe Ciel's revenge against Victoria stems from several vendettas that Victoria exacted on Ciel's predecessors. See now what I mean about the circumstances behind Ciel's revenge being mostly about dead people, Anon ?

Taking even into account the possibility of the RCMT : if real!Ciel was manipulated by the Queen which led to Vincent's murder (planned), as well as the whole massacre of the manor (unexpected in real!Ciel's mind), then, since real!Ciel was brought back as a BD, obviously seeking the truth from him is part of our!Ciel's journey (even if our!Ciel probably doesn't suspect it yet).

Lastly, going back even further, if my theory that the Watchdog's duty is a curse that the Phantomhive family got because of their special lineage, then it goes even beyond Vincent and Claudia : Ciel versus Victoria is ultimately also about biting back, as a reminder that many generations of Watchdog got their hands dirty and died, without any freedom, fated to do as the royal family commanded.

So "what if the person you are supposed to be taking revenge on is dead or doesn't exist anymore" ? In my opinion, that is precisely what our!Ciel vs Victoria is all about.

Our!Ciel wants revenge on the one person who targeted his family -> narratively it's the wrong choice to make because, even if Victoria is indeed alive, he currently ignores how many dead people and vengeful plans his own revenge is actually built on. So, if he eventually goes on with it, he'll just perpetuate the cycle and die a meaningless death. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Meanwhile, Victoria sees our!Ciel as a threat, but not so much because of the small scale he acted on against her (Seb's threatening presence aside). Mostly its because his two predecessors were her personal and political enemies ; they defied her so they had to die and Ciel won't be any different -> it's the choice to make for wrong reasons, because she's knowingly choosing to target them, as she believes her power gives her the right to (like several kings or queens before her forced their Watchdogs to dirty their hands and die for their sake).

All in all, it's why I think that Kuroshitsuji is more or less a tale of generational trauma, but that our!Ciel has a good narrative chance to be the one breaking that big cursed revenge cycle, especially if he chooses to give up on his own revenge.

Sorry for rambling. I hope it more or less answers your question ? Thanks for reading and have a good day Anon. :))

[euno11a]

Hey can I have a mafia Taehyung × reader where she is a detective angst to fluff please

Also a mafia jungkook × spy reader where he is there to find info about him but they fall in love angst wit fluff ending

Sorry if it's too much

hello! So I did end up choosing only one to do, but if you would like me to do the other one some time in the future, don’t be afraid to ask! Warning: angst

It was never meant to happen. It was supposed to be a quick job…how did we end up like this?

Your assignment was to spy on the Mafia leader, Jungkook, and report back to your boss. But it didn’t go as planned. You were never meant to fall for him, it wasn’t your fault. It wasn’t…at least, that’s what you kept telling yourself.

“I fucking trusted you! I let you in and you fucking betrayed me!” Jungkook’s voice boomed throughout the house. He had found out that you were meant to spy on him and report back to your boss. “How could you do this to me?! To US?! You’re a fucked up person!” He screamed at you with everything he could.

“I swear to god, I didn’t say anything! I promise! I haven’t said a word to my boss! This wasn’t supposed to happen, kookie! I wasn’t supposed to-!” You cut yourself off, you were only digging a deeper and deeper grave for yourself.

“You have no goddamned right to call me that. Do you understand me? You’ve betrayed my trust. You destroyed everything we made together. It’s all your fault.” He spat in your face. He was beyond angry. Beyond feeling hurt and sad, he was vengeful.

“Kook, you gotta listen to me! I didn’t do anything! I prom-….i didn't….baby…” I felt the tears welling up in my eyes, never before crying in front of him. Yet I couldn’t turn away…I’d hurt him. I would never forgive myself.

“Why didn’t you say anything? Hm? Was it so you could kill me yourself? Get some extra dirt on me to give to your boss? God, you’re probably fucking him, aren’t you?!” His insults were becoming worse and worse. Deeper and deeper.

“IT WAS BECAUSE I LOVE YOU!” You yelled back at him. The forbidden words you two had yet to say to each other, came spilling out of your mouth in a slight desperation.

“You…what?” Jungkook stood there quietly, his once violent and aggressive voice now turned soft and vulnerable. “You love me?”

You scoffed as you wiped away your tears, “Of course I love you…how could I not? You’re perfect…I couldn’t…I couldn’t bring myself to follow through with the assignment. The original plan was to get into a relationship and then be able to get information about you. But…my plans got changed when I actually started to fall in love with you. I’m sorry, you probably don’t want to see me right now, I’ll take my lea-”

You were stopped by strong hands gently grabbing your waist, pulling you close. A gentle pair of lips met yours, kissing you softly, full of love. “Please don’t go…I don’t want you to leave. Stay. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said those things…”

“No, it’s alright. I get it, you were mad. I thought I lost you….” You spoke softly, looking into his deep brown eyes that you loved so deeply.

“You’d never lose me. I love you too much.” Jungkook spoke gently, cupping your face, showing a gentle smile.

“I love you too, kookie.” Smiling, you gave him another kiss.

[sataara]

Fanfic Recs! pt. 1

Hello hello! For yall that don't know me, I'm Billy or Sataara, either is fine, and I read a lot of submas fics so I decided to make a list of some recommendations that I have! A few things about me is that I can't deal with unhappy endings, heavy angst and/or any pairings where both brothers are with someone else (also no bl/nkship), so if you're looking for any of these types of fics, I'm sorry but you won't find it here :/

That aside, I'll make more than one post since this was getting kind of long, this first one are just multi-chapter fics! Most of these are either reunion fics or Ingo living after getting back from Hisui, with some exceptions! Gonna leave the actual description under the link with small personal notes on my opinion about them!

edit: added a few more!

Combūrere by Anonymous

Emmet doesn’t appreciate hearing his brother is dead. But if it takes everyone treating him like glass to let him fistfight a god, so be it. He’s an over-pressured steam boiler, waiting to explode. He’s already set up all the pieces, lined all his matchsticks one by one. The only thing left to do is set himself ablaze. In which Emmet becomes a vengeful spirit, reunites with Ingo, travels to an alternate universe, and fights a god. Just. Not in that order.

Words: 140,000 Chapters: 28/28

This fic got me hooked from start to finish, I was up until 5am at one point because I just couldn't put it down. Reunion with a lot of bumps in the road that only make the story more interesting and flashbacks that only add context making the fic more robust.

Last Train Home by StellarCoachman

Ingo arrived in Hisui far too early, settling in and making a life for himself there. Akari, his daughter, grows up alongside him and Lady Sneasler in the Highlands, developing a strong bond with Pokemon that serves her well when she decides to join the Galaxy Team Survey Corp. There, she meets an odd boy named Rei and takes part in the events that shape the history of the region itself. An unexpected encounter leaves her lost in an unfamiliar world. Meanwhile, Emmet has long since grown to accept his brother's presumed death, but still struggles on occasion. When he gets proof that his brother may actually be alive, he rushes off to see for himself, but he's not prepared for what he finds instead.

Words: 90,307 Chapters: 12/12

One of the many fics I'll share from this author, love their works very much and I really enjoy their different takes on their reunion! As a warning, though, this one can be very sad and it made me cry a few times too </3

Legends, ponderances, and then some. by An_Ephemeral_Walk

Of all the lands, all the regions, all the timelines, it was Unova that was chosen. It was Unova that was the first to lose someone to a mythical being outside the domain of Truth and Ideals. It was Unova that fell victim to the being already tormenting both the Sinnoh of now, and the Hisui of then. While it wouldn't be Truth or Ideals that would ultimately lead Giratina to regretting going along with Volo, it would learn the taste of regret and defeat all the same in many flavors. Stealing the partner of a fiery ghost is a lesson not learned yet, but it will be. Oh, it will be.

Words: 85,049 Chapters: 10/10

This one is a very interesting and enjoyable read, a lot of introspection, different hcs for how the characters met, just, really nice all around.

Elevated Railways by FluentInFangirl12

I'm a sucker for wingfics and I'm surprised that in all my submas fics, I haven't written one yet. This was inspired by @manchasma's wing au on tumble dot com and this specific post by @fang-tasmal (https://fang-tasmal.tumblr.com/post/682901862855426048/wing-au-time-i-like-the-traditional-wings-on-back) but im changing the lore and stuff a bit.

Words: 71,987 Chapters: 28/28

Wingfic! This one has a lot of uncle Ingo content, it's a really fun read and nice exploration of the setting with the "but what if wings?" trope added to that <3 Also, another author that has a bunch of fics I enjoy!

Ingo in Wonderland by PerpetuallySleepy

Falling for the second time, Ingo finds himself in a strange land… a strange wonderland. Well, it appears that there’s quite an adventure ahead of him. A weird and wacky one! All aboard!

Words: 71,058 Chapters: 30/30

This one I actually avoided for sometime thinking it wouldn't be something I enjoyed, but oh, I'm so glad I gave it a chance! What a fascinating and fun story! Its heart wrenching and different, I loved it all the way through!

Give Not In To Sorrow by Hare_Brained_Scheme

Something strange is going on in Hisui. There are reports of a man in white roaming the wildlands while leading a pack of Pokemon . Some say they're a mix of Pokemon, some claim they're a pack of zoroarks. Some swear that the man is none other than the amnesiac warden of the Pearl Clan. One thing is certain. Those who meet the man in white all report the same thing: He is looking for his brother. And he will not rest until he finds him.

Words: 70,551 Chapters: 12/12

This one I can not recommend enough, beautifully crafted story, completely gut wrenching, I've read it twice not counting the times I reread my favorite parts and cried a lot, mind the tags but do read it if you haven't already.

We Are Derailing by william_pkmn

Lucas is sent on a mission to investigate a sacred site to the Diamond clan. As added backup, he takes Ingo with and inadvertently unlocks his memories, deepening the mystery they have to solve together.

Words: 49,451 Chapters: 10/10

Another really interesting one! Following Ingo and Lucas as they look for clues about Ingo's past, the promise that things will work out by the end, the road to get there, it's worth the read!

A Rather Dramatic Displacement by NanixErka

Arceus grants the wish of the two heroes displaced in time However, perhaps they should have consulted Dialga with the time portion of this 10 years isn't too far off for humans, right? the scowling 5 year old didn't think so.

Words: 44,258 Chapters: 12/12

Really fun fic with Ingo and Akari being de aged and sent to the wrong time! Tons of shenanigans and also cute moments with dad Ingo <3

Autistic Elopement (if it sucks, hit the bricks) by Alienea, Juan_Pujol_Garcia

Stuck in the past? Textures suck? Tastes bad? Horribly understimulated? Just walk out! Hit the bricks! Leave through a portal with a kid you met a few months ago! What could go wrong?

Words: 42,008 Chapters: 6/6

Loooooove this one! Ingo relearning and slowly remembering his present time, while Emmet has to deal with everything that comes with Ingo being back but with no memories.

to the rift that tore us apart (and brought us together again) by Gibberish_Sorcerer

A distortion appears at a certain Unovan subway station, taking away Ingo to a different land. Emmet sees everything firsthand. (Emmet goes through a rift to Hisui, keeps his memories, and just sorta hangs out with Ingo. Also the entire plot of PLA happens with the twins going along for the ride.)

Words: 31,911 Chapters: 15/15

This one is really good! Such an interesting idea to explore with Emmet also in Hisui and now everyone has to deal with the fact that there's two of them kjdbsjakbvkjb

I Came Back For You by Elithesia_Autem_Danguarde

Upon experiencing a mysterious connection to another time and space, Warden Ingo regains his memories and makes the choice to return home to Unova where he belongs. However, he has to deal with not only his own emotions about being in Hisui for over a year, but how his absence impacted those that loved him. Settling back home isn't easy, but there are always people who stand behind him, particularly his precious little brother who missed him so dearly.

Words: 30,295 Chapters: 5/5

The care and love in this fic is so heartwarming but also a bit sad at times, I really enjoyed the concept and how the different conflicts were worked through!

A Change in Conductors by CuzReasons

Warden Ingo wakes up in a place he doesn't recognize. Subway Boss Ingo wakes up in a place he's only read about. Neither are where they should be.

Words: 23,654 Chapters: 9/9

This author is currently my favorite and I love their concepts and how they work through their stories and ideas, I recommend looking through their entire pokemon tag if you're looking for reunions and sibling antics! But talking about this fic in specific, the concept uses a common trope but the way it's used is fresh and so intriguing! I kept reading each chapter as soon as I got the notification, I cried happy tears reading it.

I am not there, I do not sleep. by digitalpen

How does it feel to be a dead man walking? The Pearl Clan found the body of a man in the icelands. His lips were blue and he had no pulse. When no one else in Hisui could identify him, his body was given to a blessed pokemon in lieu of a funeral. And yet, his spirit is seen walking about days later. Ingo haunts the highlands as a ghost. He has no home, no family, no memories, no life. What comes next?

Words: 20,249 Chapters: 5/5

This one messed me up and made me happy all over again, mind the tags and don't forget the promised happy ending!

The Warden, The Girl, & The Fox by Elithesia_Autem_Danguarde

While freely roaming Hisui, Akari stumbles upon a mysterious man in the Alabaster Icelands with a familiar face. As the two begin to form a friendship, Akari begins to realize there might be much more to this new man's presence than what it initially seems, as well as being the key to unlocking the lost memories of her friend, Warden Ingo.

Words: 68,621 Chapters: 15/15

Another one by Elithesia! I do love this one and their reunion is bittersweet at first but so comforting as it goes! The focus on this one is way more on Akari, but the brothers are the main point of the story!

Let It Simmer by EVTrainingUniversity

Having returned to the future, Ingo finds himself stumped on just who he was before Hisui as his memories still haven't returned. As such, until he can find his way back to his home station he must spend some time in the modern-day Sinnoh. Left sitting around for the most part while the investigators do their work, he decides to put a gift given to him by his friends in the past to good use by making a food recipe blog of traditional Hisuian dishes. It's by complete happenstance that Emmet stumbles upon his blog, having taken on cooking as a hobby during Ingo's absence.

Words: 6,538 Chapters: 4/4

This one is very special to me, food as a love language, as a healing tool, as a bonding experience, it's everything to me

Fear Not the Descent by ImpossibleJedi4

Some coping mechanisms formed in wake of a tragedy are healthy, some are unhealthy, and some are a mixture of the two. Emmet finds peace when he travels far below the surface of the earth, but then, at long last, someone finds him in return.

Words: 2,316 Chapters: 2/2

Very short one but it's so touching... Please do mind the tags if any of those concepts might make you uncomfortable, better safe than sorry

[midnightstar-90]

A Cry For Help

Evan Buckley x Platonic! Fem! Reader

Request from @lillybearblog: “can i make a request for Buck from 911? Maybe you are bestfriends for awhile and he comes over and notices there is a small fire or something. You are passed out on the floor and wake to the smoke and Buck checking your pulse or something. He gets you out safely”

Summary: Buck is recently informed that his friend is going through a recent breakup, that has led her to begin drinking in a way Buck had never seen her drink before. When a fire starts at her house, Buck is determined to help his friend.

Warnings:  Angst, Alcohol, Mentions Of Infidelity, A Little Blood (But No Gore Or Anything), Language

A/N: I wrote 3/4ths of a story that I didn't know how to finish, and then this came to mind. As always, I'm sorry for the delay. I'm not very consistent, nor am I organized. But I am trying.

I hope this is good. I know that it's not exactly what you asked for, but I tried to at least keep the concept. As I said, I had to rewrite the story, and it was exactly as you explained, but the way I had written it felt like it was never-ending, and it was just taking too long.

Words: 2.3K Words

It was about 10 PM when Buck was finally off the clock. He was finally able to kick back and relax after facing a very grueling 24-hour shift.

The past day had consisted of Buck suffering through small house fires, drunk drivers, and even vengeful exes. Luckily for Buck, everyone came back alive, some with injuries, but surely all still alive. They delivered a man who suffered 4 stab wounds, from a woman everyone suspected to now be his ex, to the hospital. And the 118 quickly, yet safely made their way back to the firehouse.

As soon as the truck was placed in park, Buck was quick to release himself from the safety of his seatbelt and out of the vehicle. He began to make his way to the locker rooms after stretching his arms and neck a little. “Another one bites the dust,” Buck spoke to himself with a small, happy smile.

Eddie came up behind Buck, clapping his hand on his shoulder, as he joined Buck on his walk to the locker room. “Buck,” Eddie called out. Buck turned his head to face the Latino. His smile grew on his face. “What made you so happy? Aren’t you tired?” Eddie asked, also smiling but with a questioning look.

Buck answered, “I am. I’m just happy that our shift’s over. This shift made me happy to realize that I am no longer Buck 1.0. I’ve matured into a Buck that I never thought I could be.” Buck’s hands moved sporadically, through the air, as he spoke. His line of sight was lost in the distance.

Eddie congratulated the younger man as they entered the locker room. Their conversation shifted to a different topic while the two changed out of their work uniforms.

Their conversation came to a halt when Bobby frantically stormed into the locker rooms. “Have any of you heard from Y/N? I found out some bad news, just now, and she didn’t come in for work.”

The two stared at the older man in concern. “She didn’t call in?” Buck asked, confused. Bobby shook his head.

“No. No, we haven’t heard anything,” Eddie spoke up. Bobby nodded his head with a sad smile before he walked back out of the locker room.

Buck and Eddie looked at each other with a scared look. “I’ll- um- I’ll check up on her,” Buck told Eddie. 

Eddie gave Buck a slight nod, to let him know that he understood. He grabbed his bag and started his way to the locker room doors. “Let me know what happens,” Eddie replies, then leaves.

Buck stayed behind. Something told him that something was wrong, and it all started when Bobby told him about Y/N not coming in. He grabbed his phone, unlocking it to see 10 unread texts from his friend, 5 missed calls, and 1 voicemail, all within the last hour.

Buck read through the texts. Most of the texts were about how much Y/N now hated her boyfriend after catching him cheating. Buck could tell his friend was drinking, because with every text, somehow, the words looked slurred. 

Buck felt his jaw clench as he read the text. He couldn’t believe that someone like Will, Y/N’s now-ex-boyfriend, could treat a person who is so sweet and caring like that. He didn’t deserve Y/N. No one did, in Buck’s mind. She deserved more than what the world has given her, and it seemed unfair that right now Y/N’s chugging down a bottle of something she’ll regret drinking in the morning, and Will’s off with some chick that Will deemed better than Y/N.

He moved off of messages and clicked on the “phone” app. He opened Y/N’s recent voicemail and was instantly upset when he heard her start to speak. “Heeeyyy, Buck,” she slurred. Buck grimaced at how drunk she already was. “I don’t know if you got my messages, but I don’t know what to do. I know you’re probably at work because we were all scheduled together, but can you come over when you get this?” It hurt Buck to listen to this. He could hear her beginning to cry, and he wasn’t there to comfort her. “I thought he loved me. He even proposed a week ago. But it seems all that was fake. He’s been going out with that fucking whore, behind my back for months, Buck. MONTHS. I thought he loved me…” She paused, and Buck looked down at his phone, taken aback by the vulgar language that was spewing out of her mouth.

 “…Fuck,” she cursed over the phone. “Shit… Fuck.” Buck didn’t know what was going on, but whatever was happening over the phone couldn’t have been good, based on her change in tone. Suddenly a loud thud was heard over the phone before the voicemail cut off. Buck looked through his phone to see if there was anything else, but the voicemail was the last thing he received from the girl.

Buck raced out of the locker room, in search of Bobby. But as soon as he got to the main floor, the bell had gone off, signaling an emergency in progress. Bobby rushed past Buck, but Buck was quick to grab his captain’s arm.

“Bobby, there’s something I have to tell you. It’s about Y/N,” Buck tried to speak but was cut off by Bobby.

“There’s an emergency at 128 West Lafayette St,” Bobby quickly said, hoping Buck would understand what he was saying. Luckily, he did. Buck’s eyes looked up at Booby in concern. “That’s Y/N’s address,” Buck said in dismay. Bobby only gave the younger man a nod as a reply. 

“Can I go with you guys?” Buck asked.

“I don’t know. We already lost too much time here talking-” 

“I’ll be quick,” Buck argued.

Bobby let out a small sigh. “Sure, but you have 5 minutes, and then we’re out,” Bobby agreed. And with that, Buck was off. He rushed back into the locker room and quickly applied his work uniform, and then back to the main floor where he and a few others threw on their fire protection gear before getting into the truck.

By the time the 118 made it to Y/N’s house, what dispatch described as a small fire, now covered half of Y/N’s small home. Buck watched as fire tried to escape the house through broken windows. It took almost everything in him not to jump out of the moving vehicle. He sat patiently, waiting for the driver to park the truck, so he could get out and save his friend. 

The truck stopped, and Buck practically flew out of the vehicle, not waiting for anyone. “Okay,” Bobby said outside the truck, calling everyone in, around him. “The fire is quickly escalating, so we need to quickly evacuate the building and get that fire out. Johnson, you, and Wilks will be putting the fire out from the top. Gomez and I will be on the ground, working to put out the fire. Buck and Todd, I want you to make sure every room in that house is clear. Got it.”

“Got it!” Everyone replied.

Everyone went their separate ways. Buck and Randall Todd, a fellow 118 member, headed into Y/N’s home. Buck had no clue where he was going. He only knew that Y/N was drunk before the call went dead and that she was upset. “I’ll get upstairs,” Randall said, earning a thumbs up from Buck.

Buck searched the living room, bathroom, and dining room before his walkie went off. “Cap upstairs is clear,” Buck heard Randall say from his walkie. It went off again, but this time Bobby spoke, “What about downstairs?” Buck grabbed his walkie and spoke, “All is clear, except for the kitchen. Heading that way now.”

He made his way to the kitchen, and the sight before him made him stop in his tracks. Y/N lay on the ground, a little ways away from the stove. Her head lay in a small pool of blood, meaning she hit her head hard.

Buck rushed over to the girl, giving her a little shake. “Y/N, hey, are you conscious?” Buck asked, slightly tapping the girl’s face. The girl stirred slightly under Buck’s grip. “Buck?” she murmured.

Buck grabbed his walkie and spoke into it, “I found Y/N, cap. She’s barely conscious. She hit her head really hard.”

“Bring her out, Buck.”

“Copy that.”

Before picking the girl up, Buck observed the area around the girl. On the counter next to her was an empty bottle of Jack Daniels. Buck had never seen or heard of the girl ever drinking that. In fact, he remembered Y/N specifically telling him that she’d rather die than be caught drinking that. Buck scoffed at the memory.

He bent down to grab the girl. His large hands swept under the girl to pick her up, but they quickly retracted when he heard something crunch under his feet. Glass sat spread across the floor next to the girl, leaving Buck to believe that she was carrying a glass in her hand when she fell. And on the other side of the girl, Buck found Y/N’s phone completely cracked.

Buck tried picking the girl up once more, coming out successful. He lifted her up, holding her in a bridal-like fashion, with his arms supporting her back and legs. Buck made his way out of the house, where he was met by Bobby and two paramedics from the 118. He placed the girl on the open gurney. 

Y/N stirred awake once more, this time longer than the last. The first thing she saw was Buck, which put a smile on her face. “Heeeyy, Buck,” She said. Buck frowned, remembering the voicemail that led him here. She shifted as her co-workers took note of her pulse and potential energies. 

When she finally got comfortable, she noticed Buck’s frown. She looked away from Buck, copying the same sad look Buck had shown. Her eyes shifted over to Bobby, who carried a look of disappointment. It took a second to realize why he was looking at her like that. She had brought back something in him that Bobby hated reliving.

She looked between the two and softly said, “I’m sorry.” Y/N couldn’t bring herself to look at either of the men, but they surely had their eyes on her. Buck grabbed the girl’s hand, caressing it with his thumb. “You have no reason to be sorry,” Buck spoke. 

Y/N shook her head “no” as she began to block out everything around her. The memories that led her to this moment in time all flashed through her eyes. She remembered everything. She remembered coming home from lunch with some friends to find Will lying in bed, her bed, sweaty, next to a girl Y/N did not know. She remembered throwing the engagement ring he had given her, just last week, in his face. She remembered kicking him out of the house, speeding to her closest liquor store and purchasing alcohol that she never thought she’d drink, and then going home and drinking until she couldn’t remember anymore.

“Y/N,” Buck called out, getting her attention. Y/N cried. She didn’t know what else to do. Everything hurt. Her body ached in pains she had never experienced before, and her heart was practically torn to shreds, so she just let it all out. 

“Y/N, Bobby and I are going to meet you at the hospital when all of this is done,” Buck said. His heart broke to watch the girl break down like this. He wiped a tear from her face before Andy and Samara, the two paramedics on duty, began to get Y/N into the ambulance. 

Bobby came up behind Buck and stared at the crying girl. “Go with her,” Bobby said. Buck spun around to face Bobby in shock. “What?” “You heard me,” Bobby argued. 

Buck scoffed, “I have to help with the fire.”

Bobby’s head tilted at the man in front of him, giving Buck a knowing look. “You’re off the clock. I let you come to make sure Y/N was fine, and I want you to do the job you were assigned. Plus, Y/N needs someone by her side. I’ve been where she’s been, and I wish there was someone like you that was by my side when I needed it most,” Bobby said, giving the boy a soft smile.

Buck saw the pain in Bobby’s eyes as he attempted and failed to not look at the girl in the ambulance, struggling to cope with what had happened. Bobby looked at the girl as if she were his daughter. He saw a lot of himself in her, and it pained him to have to watch her suffer to the point where it got this bad. So, Buck discarded the part of his uniform that belonged to the firehouse and handed them to Bobby. 

Bobby gave Buck an assuring look, putting a smile on Buck’s face. “Hey, wait up,” Buck called out to the paramedic that was trying to close the doors, so they could leave for the hospital. They opened the doors again, allowing Buck to jump in. Buck climbed in, sitting next to Y/N as she stared up at the ceiling of the truck with tears streaming down her face.

Buck’s hand met Y/N’s, and he squeezed it, letting her know that he was there for her. “It’s gonna be alright,” Buck whispered to the girl, but she didn’t respond. Her eyes stayed focused on the ceiling, not reacting to anything but her inner thoughts. But that didn’t stop Buck from comforting the girl. She’d been through a lot in 2 days, and Buck wasn’t going to add to that. Not that he wanted to either.

“You’ll be okay,” Buck said again, only louder. And he continued to remind her of that throughout her entire recovery, because it was a cry for help, and Buck wasn't going to ignore it.

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